Trying Hard to Ignore You

Change

I took the first flight back to California, and it was so lonely in the airport without Spencer.

Kendall and Ethan tried to tell me not to go back, but they don't know why I was going back.

I sold everything.

My furniture, everything I didn't need, I sold it.

All that's left is clothes and a necklace that I've had since I was a baby. I arrived in it, and I have the blanket I arrived in.

I packed clothes and things I couldn't sell, and then I loaded up the car.

I sold that Ford.

It just reminded me of Ashton, and I don't want to remember him.

I bought a 2003 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo.

It is steel gray and has LED headlights.

It's sexy and it's more me than that ford ever was.

Plus, it only has 46,000 miles on it.

I drove across the country, to Fort Myer's, and got a hotel.

I searched and searched for a place and nowhere was good enough.

I looked around in Sarasota and found a place, a one bed, one bath.

It's clean and nice and well taken care of.

I got a job at Walgreens.

I'm a pharmacist so I handle people's pills and such.

I bought new furniture, and now I live in Sarasota.

Ashton tries to talk to me every day so I changed my number.

I've been here about a month now, and I ignore my thoughts about Spencer, but I'm sitting at home with my brother and Kendall, staring at his door in my open coat closet.

"Have you used the number?" Kendall asks.

"What number?" I ask innocently.

"Audrey, you know what I'm talking about." She says.

"I don't want a boyfriend."

"He said friend." She says.

"Just use the number."Ethan says.

I shake my head,

"I'm going to the beach.

I stand up go to the bedroom.

I put on my black bikini top, which has two straps, and I put my hair up in a neat bun, and I put on bottoms with two straps around the waist. I pull on a white sundress over it and a pair of flip flops, and then I leave.

Kendall and Ethan follow me without asking, locking the door, and go with me to the beach.

I drive around until I find a good place.

I keep that note and the ring with me everywhere.

They're my two unsolved things.

Until I figure out what to do with them, I'm going to keep them with me.

I find a bar on the beach and go to it, sitting down on the stool in the sand.

Kendall and Ethan sit to my right.

"You should text him." Kendall says.

"No." I say, accepting my beer from the bartender. I pull my dress of, putting it on the back of my chair.

"He is the only guy who isn't your brother that has ever made you feel like you were worth something. If you don't call him, I'll call him and pretend to be you." Kendall sighs.

I pull the note out of my wallet, staring at it.

I've been ignoring it for weeks.

I'm trying to hardest to ignore him, but why?

Why am I doing this to myself?

I could use a friend, and that's all he wants to be for me.

"I don't know." I say.

"Audrey, you're being ridiculous." Ethan says. "He just wants to be friends with you, and you just want a friend. Just call him."

I stare at the note.

His number is starting to fade.

I sigh.

Just friends.

I unlock my phone and punch in the number.

With a wave of confidence, I hit the green button and raise the phone to my ear.

It rings five times, and then stops.

"Hello?"

I recognize his voice.

I've never started the conversation before and I don't know how.

Think!

"Hello?" He asks again.

"I have your jacket." I say finally.

I hear a shuffling noise.

"What was your name again?"

Oh god, how mortifying.

I've been thinking about him every day and he doesn't even know my name.

Oh my god.

"Audrey." I say.

"Oh right!" He says. "God, sorry." He sighs. "I'm aware you have my jacket."

"Well...do you want it back?" I press.

This is my way of trying to put myself out there.

I hear him laughing quietly.

"Sure. Coffee?"

"Um...sure."

"Wait, don't you live in California?" He asks.

"No, I moved."

"Oh. Okay. Where?"

"Sarasota."

"Oh wow, okay. Have you been to the beach yet?"

"Uh...yeah." I say.

I hear seagulls, and I look around.

There's no seagulls around me.

"Okay cool." He says. "Right, so coffee?" He asks again.

"I already said yes." I say, frustrated.

"I forgot how grouchy you are." He says. "Look, I can't today. Tomorrow?"

"Sure, what time?"

"Noon." He says. "Is that good for you?"

Ashton never cared if the time was good for me. If I worked and he wanted me somewhere, he would expect me to get off of work.

"Yeah, noon is fine." I say.

"Excellent. Meet me at the Starbucks on central and first."

"Okay." I say.

"Bye."

"Bye."

We hang up.

"Well?" Kendall asks.

"We're meeting tomorrow so I can give him his jacket and then we're never talking again."

"Why?" Ethan demands.

"He doesn't even know my name." I say. I put a twenty on the counter, grab my dress and wallet and car keys and walk off, putting my sunglasses on my face.

Guys stare at me as I pass, and my brother and his wife follow me.

I get in the Jeep and start the engine, blasting the AC.

How mortifying.