Trying Hard to Ignore You

Axel

I only went to my apartment when we got home if Spencer was with me, and I sold it because I don't want to stay there since Ashton knows where I live. When I'm ready to move, I'll pull my things from the storage unit and find a place.

I've been staying at his house for a month and a half. I'm not angry anymore, the feeling has faded. I had to go to therapy a couple times a week and it helped a lot, and now I'm okay again, but I'm nervous.

I don't know that I can move. I'm afraid to be alone.

It gets lonely though because Spencer works every day.

I spend a lot of time at the bakery, and it's almost done with construction.

I need to go move though. I need to get my life back. Spencer will understand, but he also understands if I don't want to leave.

I still work at the pharmacy but I don't work every day so when I'm home, I get bored.

I don't want to move and be alone.

I'm out driving around in the Jeep now, bored.

I pass a lot of stores, driving through downtown.

I decide to go explore over by Tampa, bored.

It takes me two hours to get there, going over a huge bridge.

I pick a random exit and get off, driving around the town.

I go into a place called Largo, driving around there, and then Clearwater, and then back to Largo.

I'm so bored.

I pass a place with a big red sign.

Puppies Puppies Puppies!

I hesitate.

Should I?

I decide too late, missing the turn.

It's probably a good idea that I didn't. It's fate. Fate doesn't want me to.

And then I see a sign a few miles down the road.

All About Puppies

Shit. Now I have to go.

I mean, that's basically God telling me to go, right?

Before I even answer my question, I'm parked in the parking lot, pulling out the key.

You're just here to hold them. That's it.

I walk inside.

"Are you over eighteen?" A women asks, holding a bottle of hand sanitizer.

"I'm twenty five." I say.

"Oh. Okay." She puts some sanitizer in my hands.

I walk through the fenced area.

There's puppies everywhere! They have big puppies and little puppies and medium puppies.

They're all three months or so.

I walk around, reaching in to pet some of them, but they're all so hyper.

I go to every cage, and I play with some and pick some up, but they just try to bite me.

Maybe I'll go to the other one.

I leave, getting back in the Jeep, and pull out into the busy road. I make a U-Turn and head back the other way.

You just want to see them, that's all.

I park and go inside.

These puppies are much calmer. Some are awake and playing quietly with their bed mates, and some are sleeping.