1) ~ When someone complains about giving people rides
Them: I'm not a fucking taxi service. If I'm giving you a ride then I expect money.
> That would make you a taxi service
2) ~ When someone is being annoying
> Damn are you a smoke detector? 'Cause you're annoying as hell and never shut the fuck up.
3) ~ When someone needs their ego deflated ASAP
Them: Why don't you just go kill yourself?
> To kill myself I'd have to climb up to your ego and jump down to your IQ :)
4) ~ When your SO is getting on your last nerve
Them: Aww you're so cute when you're mad.
> Well buckle your seat belt 'cause I'm about to get really fucking adorable.
5) ~ Facts
Them: You'll always need me.
> Are you air?
Them: Tf no?
> Well are you water?
Them: No??
> I don't fucking need you then, do I?
Them: O_O
YOU ARE READING
The Book Of Comebacks
HumorThis is a book full of sarcastic, witty comebacks you can use when you're sick and tired of people, which is basically me every single day. This book is purely for your benefit, so feel free to use these comebacks for your own books or just to have...