1) Did your brain just take a laxative? 'Cause there's a lot of shit coming out of your mouth right now.
2) Just knowing that I have successfully pissed you off makes my day. :)
3) Cheating is not an accident. Falling off a bike is an accident. You don't trip and fall into a vagina.
4) Cheating on a good person is like throwing away a diamond and picking up a pebble.
5) I need to find myself a guy who ruins my lipstick, not my mascara.
6) Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither.
7) I didn't realize you were an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please, continue while I take notes.
8) What's that? You heard a bunch of shit about me from someone who hates me? Well damn, then it MUST be true!
9) Yes, of course I have time to listen to you complain about all the stupid shit I can neither help you with or do anything about.
10) Thanks for your complaint. I shall file it right between 'Don't give a flying fuck', and 'Sucks to be you'.
YOU ARE READING
The Book Of Comebacks
HumorThis is a book full of sarcastic, witty comebacks you can use when you're sick and tired of people, which is basically me every single day. This book is purely for your benefit, so feel free to use these comebacks for your own books or just to have...