1) Don't tell me to "calm down" when I'm angry. It's like stabbing someone and then asking why they're bleeding.
2) Them: Why don't you ever smile?
> Oh I smile, just not when you're around.
3) Them: Hahaha you're adopted.
> At least they wanted me. :)
4) Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen.
5) Them: Jeez, are you on your period?
> Maybe I started the day in a pool of my own blood, but is that how you'd like me to end yours?
6) Them: Why are you scared? The spider is smaller than you.
> Yeah well so is a grenade.
7) Them: Did I miss something?
> Yeah, the door out of my life. You should go find it now.
8) Keep rolling your eyes at me bitch and you might find your brain back there.
9) Them: For the first time in my life, a girl told me she loves me.
> Aren't moms awesome?
10) Them: I'm getting back together with my ex.
> I'm proud of you for recycling.
YOU ARE READING
The Book Of Comebacks
UmorismoThis is a book full of sarcastic, witty comebacks you can use when you're sick and tired of people, which is basically me every single day. This book is purely for your benefit, so feel free to use these comebacks for your own books or just to have...
