1) ~ When someone talks about you behind your back
> Hi, excuse me, I just wanted to let you know that my back is not a voicemail; feel free to leave whatever you have to say to my face. :)
2) ~ When someone hits you with the ultimate cheesy line
Them: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
> I wish I would've fallen from heaven but actually, I dug myself out of hell.
3) ~ A total classic; one of my favorites
Them: Oh hey baby, can I get your number?
> Yeah sure, write this down. It's 1-800-FUCK-OFF
4) ~ Another classic
Them: *Does literally anything annoying*
> Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have five fingers, the middle one's for you.
5) ~ When someone says you weren't or aren't invited to something
> Well no one invited you to Earth but hey, you still forced your way in.
YOU ARE READING
The Book Of Comebacks
HumorThis is a book full of sarcastic, witty comebacks you can use when you're sick and tired of people, which is basically me every single day. This book is purely for your benefit, so feel free to use these comebacks for your own books or just to have...