A to Z of Writing

You Got The 'People Skills'??

This in my opinion is one of many important skills writers must strive to acquire. If a writer decides to start a team, you definitely need people skills or your team would just fall apart. One needs to learn how to approach, discuss or interact with others in order to get the job well done. 

Below are a few things one could take into consideration to improve their people skills.

Courtesy – Be Polite in speech. Don't hasten anything you say. Learn to listen to others before you talk. A saying I strive to by is "Be Slow to Anger yet quick to Listen". Etch these words into your mind for efficiency in your team.

Conflict Resolution & Negation – You would be surprised that after settling most conflicts, the main cause is always something so little and simple such as toothpaste, or who left the toilet unflushed. Wherever you find living things, especially humans, there's always bound to be conflicts.

Below are some tips my lecturer taught me for resolving conflicts in a team or any given situation;

· Speak to the individuals involved and its much wiser to do this PRIVATELY.

· Next, focus on the SPECIFIC behaviors during the conflict. Ignore the Labels, Blames or Generalizations.

· Now bring to their attention how these specific behaviors made you FEEL.

· HEAR them out without any distractions. If there's need for comfort, please provide it.

· SUMMARISE the points of Agreement & Disagreement.

· Finally, agree on a Collaborative Plan to Deal with the issues, if promises are made, KEEP THEM.

For Those actively participating in the conflict;

· Let down your defensive shields. Being Defensive will discourage honesty towards you.

· Be Honest with yourself by knowing your faults. This is quite difficult because in most conflicts, everyone feels like they are in the right. If the team feels like you didn't do something well, they may be right and its time you start checking that behavior.

· Lastly, Thank them for raising the issue. It makes them feel their concern and help wouldn't be put to waste.

Listening Skills - This is quite self explanatory. But some tips include making direct eye contact when listening, give your full attention, ask frequent and related questions about the topic of discussion and provide comfort.

Proper Time Management – You need to manage your time wisely and effectively to have an efficient team. After all, you would be assigning roles and what most of your team does. If you lack Time Management skills, then your team comes crushing down really quickly and so would your project.

Setting Priorities – This is like an elaboration on Time Management. You must learn to decide which task gets done first and which can be pushed further down the to-do list. Imagine you are to walk your dog down a street, you can just get up and start walking it. 

You need to prioritize its safety and with that, you'll need a leash. Getting that leash is top priority. Supposed you are to get the dog to the destination in three minutes, stopping on the way to chat and do other 'unnecessary' things, given the situation, is the opposite of priority. 

After getting the dog to its destination, then you can do your other little businesses.Basically, know what's most important and urgent and execute them in order.

Tact – Explaining this with examples is the best course of action. Imagine you have a friend that has a smelly mouth (I bet most of us have had friends like that). The issue is that telling the person upfront can be uncomfortable and even lead to unnecessary fights.

You may hurt the person really badly but in your defense, you are just trying to help! How you tell the individual whiles reducing the impact of how they react is Tact. 

So with the above scenario I gave, you could call the person aside and say it in a good-humored way or even offer a mint to suggest something.

Appreciation – People love to be appreciated for the things they do. Its good practice if you cultivate this habit because it can take you a really looooong way. 

A friend always leaving you notes in the bathroom every morning or always sacrificing the edge of the bench seat just because you like sitting there would gladly and happily continue f you show appreciation. 

Sometimes say it out so they know you appreciate what they do or even get them something gin return. This also applies to teammates. 

If you know you have a habit that's hard to deal with, let your teammates know you are happy they put up with it because NOBODY IS PERFECT in the end.

Motivation – Constant motivation from you goes a long way in bringing the team closer and improving morale. Encourage team members once in a while to improve efficiency.