Beyond my Beating Heart

Chapter eleven: Alone again

Play i hate u i love u by Gnash and Olivia O'Brien for this chapter

***

Jett's point of view.

I did not expect what Lauren had said would be true. I did not expect for my whole new life to turn on me so fast. So quickly.

My cell phone is currently sitting in my hands, awaiting a simple text from June, but the screen is blank. Stupidly, hideously, blank. I do not even count the occasional texts from Lauren or Chris, they do not matter to me anymore.

My side of the story does not have much to it. I said some things that I knew to be true. Although I know that I should be cautious, I am still longing for June's presence. Schizophrenia or not, she is still the only thing on my mind.

I know that eventually I need to tell Nana and Nanty about what happened so they do not lkeep pestering me to tell them what is bothering me, but for some reason, I cannot bring myself to utter a word about the situation to them.

My phone buzzes yet again with another annoying text message from Lauren. I really should have put this think on airplane mode last night.

"Hey honey, can I come in?" My grandmother, Nana asks softly.

I sigh and shut off my phone before replying, "Sure, come in."

She walks in and sits down next to me on my bed and gives me a sympathetic look.

"What's bothering you?" She says caringly.

"Nana, it's nothing serious." I reply.

"Jett, I don't do secrets, tell me what's on your mind."

"What do you know about schizophrenia?" I ask.

"Many things, why?"

"Well, since you used to be a counselor, I thought you could share a few things with me about it. You know, for research purposes!"

"Well I would have to know what kind of research project it is because schizophrenia is really complicated."

"Well, umm, its just something I'm interested in and wanted to find out about. Umm yeah."

"Good job. Your such a bad liar. Umm yeah, really."

"I'm not lying. I just want to learn about it."

"Why do you want to learn about it?"

"I uhh know someone who has schizophrenia."

"Who."

"Ohh dang I was trying to avoid this. Do I have to tell you."

"You're the one who brought it up."

"Fine. My best friend. Someone who I thought I could trust."

"June?"

"Umm."

"June."

"Ugh yeah, yes. My girlfriend brought it up. She told me that June and some dark secret and yesterday she finally spilled the beans."

"Ohh honey I'm sorry, but why are you sad? Do you feel bad for her?"

"Well kind of, I just, I just."