She woke up, cold air pressing against her chest. The feeling of guilt washed over her watching him sleeping so peacefully, not knowing of what was happening when he wasn't there.
Another's hands on her skin, another's lips touching hers, saying I love you to another person. Everything she told him was a lie, to protect him, to protect their relationship.
She lied, she lied to him everyday, but she could never break his heart. He was was too innocent, to kind, to loving. She couldn't look him in the eyes and tell him what she had did.
No matter if she wanted to stop, she couldn't, If she tried to break things off with the person she hooked up with behind closed doors, she knew the trouble she would get into, the way he would hurt her.
"Morning" Shawn said waking up to the sound of an alarm, shaking Camila out of her thoughts
Camila's boyfriend for now six years, all throughout high school and now collage, he was there, holding her hand through thick and thin. Now one stupid mistake took away all the trust she built away.
"Good morning" she replied silently, not giving him eye contact, she couldn't look him in the eyes, not after everything she had did.
"Well I have classes, I'll se you later tonight" Shawn smiled getting out of bed
"Yeah" she returned the smile
"Love you" he leaned in and connected his lips with hers she smiled again. She didn't deserve his touch.
He had headed to the bathroom stripping himself from his clothing, letting the cold water hit his bare body washing away the sweat away from last night.
Camila heard the shower turn on, she wished she could wash away the guilt, the pain. Everything she had done, she wished she could wash it down a drain.
But what she did, and what she kept on doing couldn't go away. It wasn't a fairytale where all your problems would just go away. This was reality, harsh reality.
She sat there wrapped up in her blankets, thinking. Thinking of what might happened if Shawn found out, what would happen to her, would she be left alone to struggle in the dark, All alone.
Shawn helped her, helped her cope with the death of her mother, the abuse her father caused her. He was there when she was struggling, and to pay him back she cheated on him? How disgusting is that.
Shawn walked out of the bathroom shirtless wearing only a towel to cover his bottom half. He grabbed clothed from the dresser that Camila and him shared.
He quickly changed and walked out of the bathroom with damp hair forming small curls.
Camila didn't have any classes today, she would be left alone, or would she? Would she be with him. The one causing her all her anxiety?
Camila got up from her bed and walked to the door, saying goodbye to Shawn
"I'll see you later, bye babe" Shawn said kissing Camila lips
She closed the door behind and slid down to the ground, absolutely breaking down.
The guilt was getting worse everyday. Him not knowing of the things she did, and her still being shown his love which she doesn't deserve are eating her insides.
She could just tell him, but seeing the heartbreak running through his eyes isn't something she wants to see, let alone picture.
10 consisted minutes of crying on the floor, she decided to get up and head to the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror.
Her eyes were bloodshot and her now rosy cheeks stained with her tears, she looked like a mess.
She headed to the shower where she removed from her night clothes and washed her body with warm water. 20 long minutes she finally stepped out of the shower now changing into a white crop top with high waisted jeans. She blew dry her hair and tied her hair up into a simple high ponytail. She walked out of the bathroom, into her bedroom. She ate breakfast and realized she had gotten a text from him
-may I come over😏
The text read. She knew she shouldn't let him come over, but if she didn't obey he would come over and hurt her. Tell Shawn lies, ruin her life. She didn't want to. But she had to
Her fingers trembled across the keyboard but she finally sent a simple 'yes'
He used her
He was Shawn's best friend, if he told him the lies
he said he would it would ruin everything.
She was doing everything to protect Shawn.
Even though it means if she had to hurt him...
A/N: first chapter, enjoy! Tried to go for a new type of plot, it may seem confusing.. but it will become clearer in the time coming!
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Cheater || shawmila story ||
Fanfiction"Why'd you do it?" "If I didn't, he would hurt me, and you" "What do you mean?"
