Chapter 12

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Lexi's P.O.V.

I had a message from Jordan earlier. I ignored it and texted our mutual friend Victoria to check up on him. I'd told her about him asking me out and she said she'd talk to him. She texted back something that flipped my life upside down. Apparently we forgot protection. No wonder i feel like shit. I'm not pregnant. I can't be pregnant. There's no way i'm pregnant. I kept quiet about it as to not worry the boys and i just leave. I need to think about this. The boys were worried cuz of the nose bleed and paleness but i couldn't focus on that right now. I see a park nearby and sit on a swing. I start to swing as tears fall. This all better be a joke. I look up at the clouds as i swing and take a deep breath. There's no way I'm pregnant. Its just not possible. I wipe my tears away with my sleeve. I google the nearest mall area and decide to just take a day to myself and just ignore whats going on. This has to be a huge coincidence.

*time skip*

I pass the drug store on my way back. I take a breath. There's no way I'm pregnant. But...if I'm still dying in a few days...fuck i don't wanna think about this. I put headphones in and grab 3 different pregnancy tests. I bring them up to the counter and the cashier looks at me with pity. I hide the drug store bag in my shopping bags and head home. I'm slightly falling apart but the boys aren't allowed to know that yet. Dan worries about me but i brush him off. I lay down and silently cry myself to sleep.

Dan's P.O.V.

I hear Lexi come in. Its pretty late and she's been out all day.
"Lexi where have you been?" I ask as she walks in.
"Starbies and shopping." She answers perkily.
"You got paler. Are you sure you're ok."
"I'm fine." She says going to her room.
"Lex you look like you're dying not even exagerating." I say.
"Aren't we all though?" She asks.
"Well yeah but we're worried about you." I say.
"Well...don't. I'm gonna try to sleep it off. G'night." She says closing her door. I decide to wait a bit before bringing her to mine and Phil's room. No way in hell was i letting her sleep alone when she looks like shes dying. I think for a second that i hear crying but i tell myself i'm imagining things. I still hear it after about 10 minutes and it breaks my heart. I get up and go to Lexi's side of the house. The crying had stopped. Great. I crack open her door an see her dead asleep. I pick her up and cary her to our room where Phil was watching something on the iPad.
"Poor girl she looks aweful." He says watching her as i gently lay her down.
"I know. Thats why i brought her in here. I wanna keep an eye on her."
"Where was she all day?"
"Apparently Starbucks and shopping. That's all i got out of her but i didn't fight for answers cuz she said she was going to sleep. Thats probably the best thing for her right now." I say.
"You're probably right.." he says kissing me and turning off the iPad. We lay down in silence both worried for the girl we were falling for.

*later in the night*

Lexi's P.O.V.

I see my little girl crawling up to me.
"Mommy." She says smiling. I open my arms to cradle the child. She lays on my chest and puts her hand on me i ignore her sharp nails saying i'd cut them later. Her nails dig deeper into my skin and her smile goes from childishly adorable to demonic as she sinks her claws into my chest andvrips my heart out.
"Lexi! Wake up. Lex." I awake to a frightened Dan and Phil holding me. I wipe hot tears away.
"What happened?" I ask.
"You started shaking a bit in your sleep then you started screaming." Phil answers.
"Sorry. I...had a...nightmare." I blush.
"Everyone gets those from time to time." Dan says reassuringly rubbing my back. I'm still shaking a bit and he notices. He gently squeezes my hand that i just realized he was holding.
"Hey you're ok. Take a deep breath. Thats right. In...out. Do you want to talk about it?" He calms me down. I calm a bit but the idea of telling him that aweful dream...just no. I shake my head vigorously.
"No. I just wanna pretend that never happened." I say. I try not to wince as my stomach growls.
"Alexandria please tell me you ate today." Phil says seriously.
"I ate at Starbies a little after i left." I say.
"Come on. Lets get you a snack and some tea." Dan says. We go to the lounge and Phil turns the kettle on before joining us. Dan drapes an arm around me and i lean into his side.
"You're so tense." He says pulling me on his lap and rubbing my neck. I bite my lip to keep from moaning as his soft hands gently rub my neck.
"It hurts so good." I say shifting on his lap.
"Good i guess?" He asks laughing.
"Kinky." Phil teases. I blush and a few minutes pass.
"I think the kettle should be hot now." Phil says getting up.
"Come on. You need to eat." Dan says a bit sternly. Not paying attention i make a face.
"We talked about this Lexi." He says in a slightly softer tone.
"I know. Just...i don't know not in a good head space i guess." I say not wanting to think of what might be happening to my body. A tear slips out and Dan brushes it away.
"I don't know what you're keeping from us that's been bothering you so much but you can talk to us Lex. Don't forget that." He says. Our eyes lock and i wanna kiss him so bad.
"How do you feel about Chamomile?" Phil asks comming back to the lounge.
"I love it but it makes me sleepy." I say.
"Good perfect for a night like tonight." He says handing me the tea cup. I take a sip and sigh contentedly. Dan gently sslides me off his lap and gets up. Phil puts an arm around me and i cuddle up to him. Dan comes back and hands me a granola bar.
"You need to eat more Cali girl." He says sitting back down.
"I know...i just." I trail off not knowing how to put it in words. I forgot to eat today because i was too busy trying to not have a mental break down about possibly being pregnant.
"You just what Lexi?" Phil asks stroking my hair.
"Stop biting your lip." Dan says cupping my face and sliding his thumb across my bottom lip freeing it from the grip of my teeth.
"Sorry." I blush. I take a long sip of tea and set the cup down.
"I just got some...news from someone in LA and i was too shaken up to focus on anything really. Thats why i was out all day." I say explaining without explaining.
"Was it about a YouTuber?" Phil asks.
"Two YouTubers actually." I say picking up my tea cuo and taking another long sip.
"Anyone we know?" Dan asks.
"You know one of them but the other is more of a YouTuber musician. I'm pretty sure and desperately hoping its fake drama so I'm just gonna ignore it." I say dropping the subject 
"Come back to our room? We're worried  about you Lex." Dan asks. I hate myself. First i'm a home wrecker now I'm making them worry. Good goin Lexi you fuck up.
"Sure. Why not." I shrug. I follow them to their room and crawl in the middle. I start getting lost in my own thoughts again. Why don't they hate me for being a home wrecker? Why are they so worried about me? Why can't i just pull myself together and not be a fuck up? I feel an arm around my waist and my mind goes quiet as i drift off back to sleep.

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