When All is Lost One is Found

Chapter 23: Teetering on Edges

When All is Lost, One is Found

Author: Rinoaebastel

Chapter 23: Teetering on Edges

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and gain no profit from this fanfiction other than writing practice. Harry Potter is owned by JK Rowling.

AN: This story may contain scenes taken from the Harry Potter movies and books, but it's not exact dialogue, just rewording of dialogue or omission. It is not marked.

March 1996

He muttered under his breath as he stormed down the hall. He had to get to his "duty". Draco had distracted him with some stupidity about stealing a gift from another Slytherin. The boy apparently hadn't learned he couldn't steal in Hogwarts. No matter if the boy felt overly important because his father was a Death Eater in the Dark Lord's service.

His godson was acting like the king of the place and reminded him of Potter. At least they were natural enemies, He couldn't imagine them teaming up. That would truly make his life impossible.

Opening the door to his office, he saw that all was quiet. At first, he thought that Potter decided that he was too good to wait for him. When his eyes scanned the room past his desk, his skin chilled and his throat constricted.

He wouldn't dare...

But he knew that the boy would indeed do it. It was actually happening. The light around the boy, barely viewable due to him blocking the pensieve, was a sign they'd been activated and free to witness. Potter was witnessing what he feared him seeing. What he wanted to keep private.

His hand collided with the boy's shoulder and ripped him away from the pensieve.

His nostrils flared and when his eyes locked on the confused boy's face, he felt like he was going to combust from fury. He could imagine how the boy would spread his private tale of torture to his friends.

"S-sorry, sir, I was curious and—"

"You think you can stick your nose in all places, Potter?" His interruption came with a guttural voice as he took a step towards the boy. He had wanted to hex him, punish him, but right now, he wanted to kill him. No matter if he had a debt to pay or a promise binding him, Potter had crossed a line. "That you have a right to do so?"

He had been doing everything for this brat, risking his life, risking his cover and this was the thanks he got? He hadn't expected praises from Potter, and he didn't want them, but he expected his privacy. This invasion went too far.

"I didn't know..."

"Don't try to fool me." He took a step closer to the boy, looming over him. The boy had the good sense to take a step back. "So did you have fun, Potter? Watching what a good person your father was with his companions? Did you have fun watching him bully people?"

"He wasn't like that!" This boy was truly dumb and his denial was right up there with that of the minister's denials. Even after he witnessed memories, he still defended his father.

"You never knew your father, Potter. I did. The only reason you heard any praise about him was because he was a quidditch player, a Gryffindor, and they're the favored house. Ever notice how other people from other houses never said anything good about him?"

A spark of realization crossed the boy's face, but it faded as soon as it came.

"He was an arrogant fame seeker like you, Potter."

"You're lying. He was a good man."

Severus stopped and almost growled at the boy. If he didn't release some hostility, he would kill the kid.

He snatched a vial from a shelf beside him and threw it so it shattered right beside Potter's head. "Get...out..." he said. His voice was so cold that even he wondered how he was controlling so much anger.

Potter's green eyes showed fear. Those eyes were the only thing keeping him from strangling him. "I said get out and don't dare to come back!" This time the boy turned and ran out of his office.

He pointed at the door and shut it before turning and slamming his hands down on the table. He gritted his teeth, running through all the reasons why he shouldn't go after and hex him. He needed something more than trying to reason that the boy was needed. The fact he was doing this for Lily was becoming less of a good reason.

With a scream of rage, he raked the books off his desk. His fists collided with the wooden desk until his knuckles hurt. When he felt the resulting pain, he focused on it.

The thought of giving it all up, of going back into a legitimate service with the Dark Lord, came to his mind. It was tempting now. Merlin, it was tempting to see those Potter loving idiots grovel in the mud.

No. He couldn't give in. He stood there in his office, taking deep breaths and trying to lock away the dark thoughts and bad memories.

If Dumbledore had listened to him, this wouldn't have happened. No one on this side ever listened. He wasn't good enough for good or evil. So there he tottered. Unable to leap either way without a bad outcome.

AN: Ops. I forgot I had to post double today due length and story wise. Have fun and let me know what you think! Our Severus is at the edge :( Till next week my dears!