Red Vs Blue Reader Inserts [COMPLETE]

Shopping with the blues

Authors note: Wash and Carolina are still freelancers in my eyes.

Characters: Church, Caboose, Texas, Tucker

Genre: General (lol)

• Let's change this up a bit okay?

• So of course you think you'd know what the blues would do while shopping

• Church, angry, Caboose, dumb etc. But that's boring a predictable

• To be honest Tucker would not be flirty, this guy was left with a child and all of the responsibilities of that, so he's got bags under his eyes, hasn't slept in days and is really jumpy

• A lot of "Would this be good for junior?" or "if I buy this will junior break it?"

• Mostly likely will unintentionally isolate himself by falling asleep during conversations or just blurt of some nonsense, annoying his date

• If said female was able to swindle out a conversation with him, expect tired pickup lines or just him asking about how to raise a child

• "You're a woman, you should know how to raise a child"

"What the fuck dude, I don't have a child, the fuck is that supposed to mean?" She'd say back

• Now Caboose, this boy literally needs a leash. If you leave him for more than a second he will most likely get abducted by some rando's

• That or he'd either hang around with children, alarming parents ("is he a pedo or not right in the head?)

• With the female, he would grab her and take her to the kid's sections (WHEN I SAY KIDS, I MEAN TODDLER) and just play around with all the toys

• During this, Church (him and Tucker are there "spying") would come and turn on all of the electronics before running away. What a cheeky little shit.

• Church, the dumb ass would say "I'm on a diet" when they take a break for food, but complain until she gives him food after they've ordered. If she willingly doesn't give him food, he'll just steal everything off her plate being all "subtle"

• By subtle, he'll look her straight in the eyes while stealing food off of her plate. What a little shit. Also a disgusting spender that has no idea how to save and will "borrow" money from his date if he doesn't have enough

• Okay last, but definitely not least, Allison. Allision is the weird type of girl who'll say she doesn't like shopping and be all reluctant while her date is trying to convince her, but the second they make it to the mall, she'll be BUSTLING

• "They're having a sale for clothes begs, should I buy them?"

"Do you even do laundry?"

"Nope, but I could use it as a weapon."

• Beautiful.

• She'll also beat up anyone that whistles at her or her female (girl)friend and send threatening glares if anyone even looks in her general direction

• If she's nervous and her date points it out, she'll scream about how she isn't nervous in the slightest and that they're imaging things to make themselves feel better

UH, bye.