Maybe Even Forever [Vmon/Junghope/Yoonmin]

right? pt. 1

Namjoon did eventually decide that the world deserved the photo of Taehyung he took, and posted it on Instagram after Tangled was over.

@bubbletae <3 was the caption underneath the picture. He smiled at it, then turned his phone off. When Jimin came back from the bathroom, he grinned innocently at Namjoon.

"What next? I'll let you pick."

"Isn't it kinda late to be starting another movie?"

"No. Come on, hyung. You'd be up at this time anyway."

That was true. So they watched Princess Mononoke.

("Really Jimin? You've never seen Princess Mononoke?" "Oh, shut up. You didn't know who Gordon Ramsay was until Taehyung forced you to watch Masterchef last year!")

Jimin was asleep by the end of the credits. Namjoon wasn't sure how much he had ended up seeing, but picked Jimin up (with difficulty: the boy was heavy, he needed to stop working out) and carried him into his bedroom, barely missing hitting Jimin's head on the doorway and tucking him under the covers.

He walked back into the living room, turning the TV off and pulling out his phone. There were a couple notifications from Instagram, and he clicked on the app.

@bubbletae <3

bubbletae: aww joon!! <3 <3 <3 <3

hobi_hobi: nice photo :D

dontslamthedoor: follow for follow anyone??

He was about to exit when there was a ding and a message from someone called jellymarbles.

Who was that?

He clicked on it anyway, not knowing what he was expecting.

It wasn't this.

Private Message with jellymarbles

jellymarbles

Why are you so obsessed with your boytoy

differentstarsandstories

?

who is this

jellymarbles

What's going to happen when he gets tired of you?

He doesn't stick around

Namjoon didn't reply, and jellymarbles didn't continue. He clicked on the profile. Nothing to suggest someone who knew him or Taehyung. Nothing personal to link to anyone.

He exited the app, turned his phone off, and threw it to the opposite end of the couch.

They don't know me or him in real life. Tae would never.

You weren't Best Friends For Life (yes, capitalized, because it was that serious) for nothing, he decided. Tae was not the kind of person who would just get up and leave.

And boytoy? What was that about? Tae is no one's toy.

Namjoon shook his head, as if trying to physically rid the thoughts from his head.

Taehyung would never.

... would he?

It felt like jellymarbles had planted a seed of doubt right in the part of Namjoon's brain where he locked up all his insecurities.

His thoughts and perceptions of Tae were now hyperactive. Always, always seeing whenever his smile faltered or fell. Was that because of me? Always feeling when Taehyung's hand twitched in his own or body shifted a small bit away. Does he not want to be near me? Always hearing his laugh when he was with Jimin, or Hoseok, and thinking it was louder, livelier. Would he rather be with the others?

It was a terrible thought, to think that maybe, just maybe, Taehyung didn't want to be his friend anymore.

Of course not! Tch, he would tell me. We've never kept secrets.

And the doubt was dispelled.

If only it stayed that way.

But Namjoon's brain was determined to make him suffer. Along with jellymarbles.

He's only pretending so he doesn't hurt your feelings.

He loves your other friends more.

Namjoon couldn't exactly say why he didn't just block the user.

But it was something like he was scared jellymarbles was right. And maybe a little bit convinced of it. It was like feeding the fire, helping that seed of doubt grow into a hideous, festering plant that wormed its way into all his memories with Taehyung. (Which were most of his memories.)

He's only your friend because you're pitiful.

He only helped you that day you met because he's a good person.

And you're hurting him because you're selfish.

You broke your promise to never make him sad, because he's sad every time he's with you.

He didn't know whether the thoughts echoing through his mind were jellymarbles's words or his own.

Namjoon had always trusted his own judgement.

It started off as subtle things.

Like not sitting quite as close to him. Namjoon figured that Taehyung should be given a little bit of space.

All you do is hurt him.

Like not initiating hugs or contact, and not leaning into them when Taehyung did.

He doesn't want to be around you.

And occasionally saying he needed to study when Taehyung asked him to come over.

One day he'll realize you're not enough for him and leave you behind forever.

Namjoon didn't want to imagine how it would feel to see Taehyung leave. So one by one, he began to weaken their ties so it'd be easier once Taehyung cut them.

Some part of him recognized his irrationality. But Namjoon was so blinded with wanting Taehyung to have happiness, even at the expense of his own, that he would do whatever it took.

He just wanted Taehyung to be comfortable. It couldn't hurt, right?

Right?