Enigma | The Hobbit: Thorin Oakenshield |

Ch.21 - The Start

It's been a few days since I've recovered from the darkness, given to me by Smaug. The people of the Lake, had perished thanks to all the dragon fire. All their screams haunt my memories and I don't even want to think about what I had done. Bard was right about the prophecy. I shouldn't have come. Bilbo got injured, so did most of the Dwarves and Thorin. He's the one I had scratched up pretty badly. They say it's fine but how could I ever forgive myself? If those memories of Thorin and I didn't come flooding back, would they all be dead? If that mischievous lizard was able to break me, then it won't be long until he gets to Thorin as well. I haven't even seen him since he went back to the treasure. He doesn't eat nor sleep and the company has been keeping me occupied, so that I won't search for him. Is it because of what I did? Does Thorin despise me now like he did once before? He's still my mate and I would never do anything to hurt him on purpose.

I sigh and stare blankly at the dusty chalices, tapping my fingers in rhythm on the table. Dwalin is standing across from me, along with Balin while the others are towards the back of the room. The depressing atmosphere is only making my mood worse and it's not like I can go anywhere. The moment I try stepping out of the room, I have Dwalin chasing me like a hawk until I come back. Bilbo however, left some time ago and he's really the only one I was having a conversation with. Don't get me wrong, the others are great company. It's just that Balin likes to lecture, Dwalin is sort of a kiss ass, Bombur only talks with his food and the rest well... They don't necessarily talk to those outside of their kin unless it's absolutely needed.

"Ye alright, lass?" Dwalin asks, taking a seat in front of me with his arms crossed.

I blink to snap out of my thoughts and silently nod, "I'm fine." It's partially true. But if my mate wasn't currently neglecting me then I could probably say it with more confidence. Thorin isn't that far away but so much has happened and I'd feel better if he were close. "Just wondering what out next move is going to be."

Balin hums and smiles, "All the Dwarven Kings will have heard of Erebor's return, no doubt." He glances at Dwalin then focuses on me, "They'll also want to meet the future Queen of Erebor." Dwalin chuckles and Balin gives a wink. "There will be feasts for both you and Thorin, to celebrate our new rulers. Dwarves from everywhere will come bringing gifts, most likely barrels of ale." Dwalin smacks his brothers shoulder and howls in a fit of laughter. The rest of the company cheers in response, which must mean they were listening to our conversation.

I frown at the information and stare down at my lap. The laughter starts to die down and a warm hand, grasps my shoulder.

"Do you not wish to become Queen, lass?"

Balin's question catches me off guard and I quickly shake my head, "It's not that." I rub my arm nervously and say the uncertain thoughts out loud, "Don't you think the other Kings will be displeased, having to rule with someone of my race?" They stay silent and wait for me to continue, "I'm still the daughter of Thranduil. One of the most powerful and stubborn Elves of them all. Plus, Skin-Changers aren't really welcome either and if they find out what I had done..." I go quiet when memories of the creature I once was, come rushing back. Shivers run down my spine and I hold my sides tightly. I also happen to be the daughter of the White Warg and I still haven't told them.

"It'll all be fine, Mira." Dwalin smirks and suddenly hits the table, making me jump, "Thorin would never let someone talk down on one of his own. Especially his Queen. You've proven yourself countless of times and they'll all come to see that."

I smile nervously but still feel hints of doubt. Maybe if I'm lucky, I won't have to reveal who my mother is. They all think she's dead but I don't want to add more guilt onto the pile. I've kept so much from them already and they had to find out things in ways I wish they hadn't. They saw my scars because the Goblin King humiliated me. I could've shifted sooner and not have to wait for someone to nearly die. And I should've told them from the start who my father is, instead of making it seem like I lied to them.