Swapped

Chapter 9

Joy

The guilt was eating me alive and there was nobody I could turn to. My mother would be so disappointed in me. The only friend I had was Summer and I couldn't tell her so I confided in God. I started attending services twice a week. I took on a full time job and part time job on weekends to avoid my husband and my bestfriend. Marcus complained a lot he didn't understand why I needed to work so much since he made great money. I couldn't tell him that I felt like ish in his presence he deserved better than me. He was a good, faithful, God fearing man and I was dirt. I didn't believe in divorce and I guess it was selfish of me because I loved him. I loved my husband and the lust that I had experienced with Rodney made me feel disgusting now. I refused to think about it anymore, because when I did the sick made me sick to my stomach. Marcus thought he had done something wrong he was sending me flowers at work and cooking, cleaning and attempting to sex me down at every opportunity. I simply had no appetite for my husband my head game had even fell off to the point where Marcus new I was forcing myself to do it. The last time he asked and I had obliged he couldn't keep it up. Finally he pulled away from me and just said "never mind" and walked away. I had to fix this but I didn't know how. Summer left me voice mail stating "Honey if I don't see you this week I'm coming to your job! What the freak! Are you avoiding me Joy McCoy? I have so much to tell you and I have to see you this week because Rodney and I are going on vacation. My baby taking me to Hawaii. I need you to help me pick out a bathing suit. Okay fine! I offer one Sunday for one day of shopping now you can't beat that Joy McCoy." She sounded so happy and bubbly over the phone my heart melted. Summer was my girl and I truly had played her. Again I guess I was selfish because I could not lose my best friend this chick had been the only friend I had outside of my church family. She was wild and crazy but she was real. I knew Summer loved me I mean she got on her knees to show me on more than one occasion. She advised me on things that I would never feel comfortable discussing with another human being. If this had happen with another group of friend Summer would have been the first person I called and somehow with her nothing is my fault. She would have sworn they slipped me something, or that I was temporary insane. I don't know but now thinking back on our friendship I realized I had to save it besides Rodney sure wasn't hurting. Summer had left me several messages and she was always mentioning how Rodney and her where going here or there. Then seem to be spending more time together than ever. So it was in that moment that I decided to forget everything. I had to and I would for the sake of my friendship and my marriage. For starters I had to stop avoiding my husband. So I grabbed my purse and went in search of my weekend manager. It was a little a little shrimpy Hispanic man name Chad. He was pimple faced with a terrible attitude. "Chad" I called out "I quit" I didn't even wait for him to reply. I just walked out. I went straight to Pricilla's and found a few skimpy pieces it was time to bring the loving back. I found a blue number that I knew Marcus would love and I bought a pair of heals that he would like as well. I went home and prepared the bedroom by lighting candles all through the room. Summer had been telling me to keep things spicy in the bedroom so I rubbed oil over my body leaving my shiny bottom exposed with simply a thong going up my rear. When Marcus walked in the room and found me on the bed in the doggy style position he got so excited he done something he never done! He buried his head between my cheeks and started licking the kitty. What the what! I was not expecting that. I had planned to be in control but he was so excited seeing me fondling myself from behind he nearly went insane. Needless to say my husband gave me the best loving I had ever had that day....from him. I mean there was no topping Rodney period. He just commanded respect in the bedroom. It was his domain. Marcus had me sore though I could tell he missed his wife because I literally had to beat him off me. Like I'm serious he could not get enough. I called in the next day and spent that day soaking. And this fool called me and when I told him I called in he left work early and came home for more! "Baby I don't know what I done but I'm sorry I love you." I instantly felt like ish. My man was apologizing to me when he had done absolutely nothing wrong. I vowed to love this man and honor him from this day forward. I would never disrespect this man again ever! He was my everything and I would spend the rest of my life making my mistake up to him. I would be the wife he thought he married and the woman he deserved.