Swapped

Chapter 30

Crystal

I was not giving up on Jason but I did decide to back off. I knew that he would come around once he saw how much I loved him and what a great mom I was. I didn’t really want to be a mom but I knew that it was the only way to keep Jason involved. I was starting to enjoying having him all to myself to until he seen Taylor on the street with the other guy and went all crazy.

“Look girl you need to let it go. He doesn’t wont you Chris” Gina said. She said that to me so much I was starting to think she wanted me.

“Do you because you keep saying that stupid shit”  I exclaimed! I knew I pissed her off by the expression on her face.

“So because I like girl I have to won’t you” she laughed “Bitch yo face look like a flat ass tire I don’t wont you. I was trying to be a friend because yo stupid ass playing yourself. A baby don’t keep no man honey he don’t want you. I could sleep with dude before you could” my feeling were hurt but I laughed to play it off.

“He can’t stand you Gina he would sleep with a man first. Any man would choose me over you.” She looked at me grabbed her book bag and stormed off. I felt bad because she was always nice to me and really my only friend, but  I just wasn’t ready to let go of the situation yet. I just knew that when Jason seen me with his child a women willing to do whatever for him. His mind would change.  I sat in the there so miserable because I missed him so much but I was trying to give him his space. It seemed to me her was starting to warm up until he seen her walking with the guy. I hated her and she was the only thing keeping up apart. If she just disappeared we would be together. I wasn’t even against raising her child with Jason. Why couldn’t she just disappear I mean what was stopping that from happening. I mean if we woke up and she was gone I bet he would mourn awhile but eventually he would get over it and he would need someone to hold him and comfort him. I laughed to myself I was talking crazy if something happen to her people would look at me immediately, but if she got sick or something maybe not. Even if she wrote a suicide note and maybe ingested something, stop it! This man was driving me crazy I was seriously considering causing her hard and she had done nothing to me. I had to let this go well maybe not let it go but I had to be more patient. My baby would be here and everything would work it’s self out I mean look at Jason and little Jason he couldn’t stay away from him if it wasn’t for the baby there wouldn’t be a Taylor wait…. If it wasn’t for the baby…. The baby is what kept him around Taylor said herself she was through the only thing that made her come around was little Jason. So maybe it wasn’t Taylor that needed to disappear it was little Jason I mean if if he was out the picture Jason would only have my child to stress over looking at Taylor would be to painful after such a loss. It would be so easy to put a pillow over the face and hell kids his age died of SIDS all the time. I sat there and imagined how upset Jason would be at first but then I thought of how happy and over protective he would be of my child after the death of little Jason. Insurance money I could suggest he take a policy out on Jason and tell him I was planning to do it for ours and then we could use the money to help take care of our child. I grabbed a note book and started writing down random thoughts. I had to get close to the baby it wouldn’t be hard he was always with Jason but how to get alone with him. Khalil I could flatten his tire like a slow leak and when he called id be there offering to babysit. No he wouldn’t leave the baby with me. Oh my God was I seriously thinking this thing out. Could I be that could and calculating? I mean he is just a baby Jason could not be that attached to him right? I was actually helping or would be. If it wasn’t for that baby Taylor would not have dropped out of school. She could start life were she left off thanks to me. Is this what I have really become I looked at Jason’s picture on my nightstand the one of us on hour first date. Yes it is, I’m a monster. Anything in the name of love.