Swapped

Chapter 44

Joy

My hands were shaking. Did he hang up on me after telling me he was in a hotel room with another woman? I wanted to call someone but I didn’t want people in our business but this was crazy. I had to something to occupy my time because I was sitting around waiting for Khalil to call. I’m not an insecure woman and Khalil showed me daily how he felt but I was upset. I kept thinking this was the universe stepping in once again to turn my life upside down because I did not deserve happiness. I prayed a lot because I didn’t know what else to do. He didn’t come home the first night and so I expected him to be home the following day but not only was he MIA but he didn’t call. That’s when I started to get angry. Who does that it’s so inconsiderate. My feeling were hurt and I was avoiding conversations with anyone because I didn’t want them to think there was trouble in paradise. After day three came around it was a wrap. I packed up my suitcase tossed it in the trunk and started driving. Was I supposed to sit around like a fool and wait to be thought of. I drove and drove and drove and when I stopped driving I was parked in front of Rodney’s house. Over the years Rodney was the only person I kept in contact with. We shared an experience together that no one could begin to understand.

It was dark when I pulled up and I just sat there because I didn’t call and it was late. I debated on knocking but I decided against it. I was putting my car in reverse when the porch light came on. He opened the door and came down the steps wearing nothing but a white robe, and house shoes. He walked up to my car and peered inside “Joy?” He said sounded really shocked.

“I’m sorry I know it’s late but I really had nowhere else to go.” My voice was shaky. He looked at me at reached out and opened my car door. “Get out, come in” He said. I did and followed him inside the house he stood on his porch with his flash light looking up and down the street before closing the door behind him. “Lauren has been stalking me” he said,

“Really? She stalks me to I’m not surprised” I told him curling up in my spot on the couch. It felt so comforting to be in a familiar place. The décor was still the same.

“So tell me what’s going on? Know way you showed up at this time of night if there wasn’t something wrong?” He said setting in a chair across from me. He stretched out his bare, hairy, long legs and leaned back like he was listening intensely.

“I met someone.” I said looking at him to see his reaction. He didn’t really show any emotion.

“Okay is he a good guy” He asked me.

“I thought he was but the other day we are sitting back relaxing and his phone rings and he jumps up and leaves. He isn’t calling me or answering calls. I don’t know what to think.” I stuttered as my eyes glazed over with tears.

“Yes you do Joy. You’re a smart woman, so you know already what’s going on.” He said leaning back into his chair.  

“I just though we had something. I can’t believe it’s another woman but when he answered the phone he told me he was at a hotel and I heard her voice in the background” I dropped my face down into my hands and Rodney eased on the couch beside me. “Joy look you are an exceptional woman don’t settle for a man that wont appreciate it. Marcus loved you, do you remember that love. That is how you are supposed to be treated.” At just the mention of Marcus name I broke down.

“Look its late let me get the guest room ready for you” He said.

“No way the last thing I need is that crazy Lauren seeing my car here all night” I said!

“Screw Lauren” He said calmly as he rose. He went in the guest room and a few minutes later he returned saying “It’s ready for you. Get some rest and we will talk more In the morning.” He leaned over kissed my forehead and headed upstairs. I went in and curled up on the bed I was gone as soon as my head hit the pillow.

The next morning the smell of breakfast woke me from my deep slumber. I found my way in the kitchen and found Rodney in some sweat pants and a white tee cooking away. I smiled at him as I poured a cup of coffee. I ignored the memory of the last time he and I found each other in this same place. I slid in the chair and watched him move around. Rodney was not aging, he was incredibly sexy with his salt and pepper gray hair. I could see the print of his penis through his sweat pants and I quickly looked away. Never going there again I thought to myself. Khalil was a wonderful and attentive lover I was pleased and satisfied although that was over I guess. He still had not called I was getting tired of waiting it out. Then it occurred to me maybe he would not call. I watched him slide food on a plate and place it in front of me. “Eat up” he said. Although it smelled great and I was starving I truly had no appetite. I poked at the food with my fork and took a few bites. “It’s delicious thank you Rodney” he smiled at me. Then poured himself a glass of milk. “How have you been friend?” I asked him. He sat across from me and took a deep breath.

“Lonely” he replied. “I try to have company so that I don’t think about it but even when I fall asleep with a woman in my bed I’m still alone”

“I understand loneliness. It wasn’t until I met Khalil that the feeling went away. Now I’m scared of it coming back.” He stared at each other in silence.

“Lets go somewhere Joy where nobody knows us and enjoy each others company for a few days, weeks” I blushed because I wasn’t sure what the invitation entailed.

“Rodney are you asking me to….”

“No I am not. I just… you’re the only real connection that I have left to Summer. Other than Mariah.” He said looking away.

“Mariah? Wow I haven’t heard that name in a long time. You guys still in contact? How is she Rodney?” He gave me a weird look then he kind of looked away ashamed again.

“You been seeing her haven’t you?” He looked extremely embarrassed now.

“Joy it just works for me. I like her being around I don’t feel lonely but”

“But the guilt is to much for her.” I commented.

“I can’t fix that Joy. I can’t change who we are or how we got here. I just know that women don’t satisfy me beyond sex. Mariah does she is a breath of fresh air but the last time she visited Lauren caught her on the way to her car and it was terrible. They both were a bloody mess before I could get out there. Mariah said she wasn’t coming back and Lauren comes by every other night, bitch is crazy. Still I half to admit the spunky attitude reminds me of Summer so much I cant stay mad at her. It’s like looking at my dead wife every time I see her.” He sighed heavily and stared at me “we are a mess Joy.”

“Yes we are” I nodded. Just then my phone rang and I noticed it was Khalil my heart skipped a beat but I didn’t answer it. Now he was going to see how it feels to wait. I hit reject then turned my phone off giving him my full undivided attention.