Remind Me Why I Love You

TWENTY-SIX

The music was playing quietly.

I observed the girl resting her head on my thigh. Her features were glowing from the sun's light, making them look angelic.

It pained me that I liked this girl before, the girl that broke me when she stopped talking. I can't even describe what was I feeling when she became distant.

But as I looked at her, I realised my heart still messes with my brain. It does that for the girl that apologized and explained her actions.

The girl resting her head on my thigh.

"So my mom... I already told you so much about my family, honestly. I mean, not as much as there is, but not even Ally knows some of those things." Lauren spoke, we were in her old used jeep. Pulled over in a lighted nature side road. I couldn't bother to look at the pretty coloures from the view I was already looking at, that was about to give me a piece of her mind.

"So you know how my parents went through a divorce? Yeah, she yelled at me because I wanted to visit my dad this summer and she was so mad that I was in LA because he moved in not that far away from California."

"What did she say?" I asked, moving some of her hair from her face.

"She just bitched about me not being an adult I should be. Like... I know she just freaked out. I don't know about what but I can't ask or she'll start yelling again..."

"It's a hard time for her... But you both need to talk, no matter what. It's the right thing to do!"

"Yeah..." the dark haired girl turned on her hip, laying on my leg with her cheek.

"Is there anything else?" I asked, watching her expression change.

"I'm just always lost..." her pale fingers played with the ends of her hair. "I was in this period of time where I felt almost nothing because of everything that was thrown at me... The divorce... You and all of that shit... Those girls bullying me a few years ago also just popped in my mind when Ally mentioned it. I feel so stupid and anxious and... Like I can't do anything about it."

She got up from her position and sat comfortably. Gesturing me and sightly slapping her legs to show it's my turn now.

I felt my sweat bleed out and every problem I ever had flashed in my eyes as I started to lay down.

I was in the same position as she was and my look focused on one dot, forgetting that this could be a huge mistake.

"This is very much turning into angst." I started off, grinning about our situation.

Her face lit up with a smile as well. The place seemed to get warmer.

"I'm kind of in a weird situation as well." I started. "My dad is being a petty bitch and... I'm just having a lot of emotional shit all pile up inside. But I guess that's normal?"

"Okay... So my dad. He is a very nice man. He was a very, very, very, nice dad. I loved him... And I mean I still do? But I don't see him as the same person anymore. He changed... And well... I told you a lot about my past. My family was always kinda fucked up, but then he tells me to fix myself?"

My fist trembled for a second as the words hit the air.

"I think I will fall into another hole like I was when my mom left. He said he thinks it's happening... And I'm scared."

Lauren's voice peeked: "Don't worry... He's very lost without her and doesn't know how to deal with it. But I'm sure it's all gonna be fine."

I felt the heat of her hand tapping the back of my head. My heart skipped a beat and all the feelings I ever had came back.

This was only for a moment, until her voice broke my thoughts.

"You can always tell me shit like that, you know? I can actually hug you now, even!"

I got up and rested on my hand, sharing eye contact with her and both breaking into a smile at my words.

"We could both use one right now."

We giggled in our own way and for the first time... Hugged.

Everywhere our bodies were touching felt warm and new.

We were fairly close in that seating. Our legs were slightly touching and our arms were wrapped around eachoter like they always needed to be.

Now... If only I knew if she liked me in the same way I started to like her again.

And perhaps it never left in the first place.

And then... My phone buzzed.

✨✨✨Happy holidays and Merry Christmas if you celebrate✨✨✨