PERMANENT - Leonardo DiCaprio

Chapter 58 - Early Bird

Monday 7.20am

I lay bundled up in my blankets, wide awake and with a feeling of true melancholy and for the first time in months, existensial dread.

Leo had left about an hour ago, and although I wanted to go with him,  he refused to let me travel all the way to LAX so early in the morning, and have to travel back by myself. Since he left, I hadn't been able to sleep, and the sun had been up for almost an hour, but I had been tossing and turning in the dark, curtains drawn. I thought that I could go back to sleep so I would have less of the day to feel sad, but to no avail. Guess there was no use moping in my bed.

I flung the covers off my body and lay for a couple of seconds, before sitting upright and crawling out of the bed, straight out the bedroom. Standing in the middle of my open plan living room, I felt, and must've looked, lost. I panned around the place slowly. Pure silence was all I was met with. Even before I had met Leo, and I lived here alone after moving from the UK, it never felt this lonely. When you get used to being around someone 24/7, their absence hits a lot harder. It seemed too quiet.

The early morning sun poured in my huge loft style windows, hitting my bare legs with warmth. For the first time in months, it actually felt warm.

Okay. No more moping around.

I turned right back around and headed straight for the bathroom, hopping in for a quick 10 minute shower. As soon as my hair was dried and I was moisturised, I grabbed a short slip dress from my closet and threw on one of Leo's old sports sweathirts over the top - it was coming to be that time of the year where it's cold in the mornings, but by the daytime, you're sweating if you wear anything more than just your underwear.

Grabbing my keys, I dashed out of the door, escaping the loneliness of my empty apartment. As the sun was shining, I opted to walk instead of drive down to Mabel's coffee shop, which I hadn't actually visited in a while because I was so busy.

The bell above the door shimmered in the sun's rays and rang softly as I opened the door, smiling at the only 2 customers that sat by the window, and heading to the back where the tills were to order and find Mabel (who didn't actually appear to be anywhere here, instead being replaced by her granddaughter).

"Hey Syd, no Mabel?" I asked as I approached her.

She shook her head apologetically, "Sorry Nel, not today. She's not been feeling too good these past couple of days...or weeks."

Frowning, I queried on, "Wait what? Is she okay?"

"She'll be fine, she's just resting for now. She's no spring chicken anymore," Syd joked, "at that age, you have to start taking things slow."

I nodded. I did want to see Mabel, but I was so in need of company and something to do that Syd was good enough company for me. I had known Sydnie and her grandmother for about a year now, and like Aaliyah, they were my friends from when I was still a newbie to Santa Monica. She was only 18, but unlike other teenage girls, she wasn't fazed by my reputation, probably because she saw me struggling to even pay for coffee when I first moved here.

"Well, tell her to take it easy. And tell her I say hi."

Syd smiled, "Of course. Anything you'd like?"

"Uhh yeah, could I get a Dirty Chai Latte, and make that a double, aaaaand," I scanned the breakfast menu, "the multigrain banana pancakes."

She scribbled it down quickly.

"Okay cool, just grab a seat I'll be right out and join you."

Syd disappeared through the back, and before I sat down, I emptied my purse into the tip jar. Mabel had always had my back, and this was the least I could do after all the free coffee she had given me in the past.

I pulled out the plush chair from the far corner of the cafe, right by the window, and sat. The dress was short, so rode up when I sat down, and I could feel the warmth of the chair that had been sat untouched in the sun for hours. 

Nipping my phone out of my fanny pack, I typed out a message to Leo.

'Hey, miss you already. Call me when you land. xo'

I lay my phone on the table, glancing out the window to watch the people walking by, but then hastily picked it back up again.

'Oh and also let me know which curtains you liked for the bedroom? Out of the 3 that we picked the other day. Love you.'

I put the phone back down and focused on not missing Leo too much.

//

Upon the third knock on Seb's office door, I heard a hearty "Come in!", so I entered, possibly the earliest I had ever step foot in his office.

He glanced down at his bulky watch, resting on his left wrist, and raised his eyebrows coolly.

"Wow, 9.05 in the morning. On a Monday morning. I have to say, I'm impressed." He reclined back into his seat and flashed a smile.

I returned the smile, though mine probably didn't look as dazzling, considering I was running on 4 hours of sleep and I was just plain sad.

"You know me, Sebastian - eager beaver..." I stopped to let my mind wander, "keen as a bean..."

I was met with a face of bewilderment.

"Okay, I'm glad you find yourself amusing but please don't ever use those phrases again."

Seb dragged over his binder and flicked through the pages.

"It's good you came here though, I actually wanted to talk to you."

I raised my eyebrows, encouraging him to continue.

"So I managed to get in touch with the production team for 10 Things I Hate About You, the film that Heath's in,"

"Oh yeah? What'd they say?"

"Well, obviously they were thrilled to find out you were interested, and they want to have you in for an audition on Wednesday."

God, it was gonna be weird having to actually audition for things again. I got lucky with Titanic - I hadn't really faced rejection yet, but if you don't fit the role then you don't fit the role. Pretty simple.

"Here," he slid over a thin booklet, "these are your lines. It's not too much to learn in two days, but I suggest you do memorise it all."

Flicking through the pages, it almost seemed daunting again.

"Wow. Guess this should keep me occupied."

"It should. I'll send over an address for you later. I've got another job for you but we'll look at that after Wednesday. I want you to stay focused with this one."

"Thanks Seb. I'll get working on it as soon as I can." I leaned back and stretched my whole body, which was, of course, accompanied by a tremendous yawn, and stood up, making sure to pick up my lines.

"I'll call you, or I'll drop by if I need anything." I declared with a tired smile, sauntering to the door.

"Penelope," he called out steadily.

I whisked my head back around.

"How's the whole moving thing?"

"Ummm, not bad, I guess. I haven't really started properly but...you know." I replied honestly, shrugging my shoulders.

He pondered for a second.

"Well if you need any help, and I'm not even talking business anymore, just as a friend, let me know. You need all the rest you can get and I know how stressful it can be when you're moving and working a job like this. Alone."

I was about to object. Leo was like my other half - I never felt alone when I knew I had him but that didn't change the fact that he was halfway across the damn globe, and I was...alone.

"Thank you. I appreciate it." And with that, I left his office and back to my car I went.