Infinity [Zarry]

20. Kisses?

"It-It can't be possible. I wouldn't-I wouldn't hurt you like that, Haz. Please tell me it's a joke."

Zayn looks at Harry with pleading eyes. He wouldn't do this to Harry, it has to be a joke. But when Harry shakes his head, Zayn knows that what Harry is saying the truth.

"It's-its okay, Zayn." Harry smiles at him sadly as he cups a side of his face gently. "I was fine. Really."

"But Har-"

"It's not like you loved me ever." Zayn's heart clench when he sees some tear pooling around his green eyes.

"Haz I am so sor-" Zayn whispers just as Harry places a finger on his lips.

"No Zayn. Don't." Harry whispers in a choked voice. Zayn frowns.

"Don't apologize for something you have no control on, Z. You are free to love anyone. Our marriage, I knew you weren't happy the way our marriage happened. I know you didn't want to marry me.  You have always lover her and have always seen me as a best friend and nothing more. And it's okay."

Harry gently removes his hand from Zayn mouth with a sad smile on his face.

Zayn doesn't know why he feels like the walls are closing in around him. He feels like he can't breathe.

He needs Harry.

He needs to hold him.

Needs to let him know that he's there for him.

He's with him.

So he leans in and envelopes Harry in a tight hug. Taking in Harry's smell, Zayn slowly relaxes and smiles when he feels Harry hugging him back.

"I like you, Haz. I like you more than a friend should do. You-you have made my life so beautiful. We-we have a beautiful daughter whom we both love so much. I don't think I have ever been this happy in my life."

By now both of them are crying on each other's shoulder. No one bothers to wipe the tears away. They know, they need to let it all out of their chests.

"And I don't care if I never get my memory. Fuck! I don't want my memory back if it means I get to start a new life with you guys."

"But-but what if one-one day you remember everything and-and start hating us both again, Z?" Harry whispers through his sobs as he holds Zayn tighter.

"That will never happen, Haz."

Harry pulls away from the hug to look at Zayn, deep into his eyes.

"Don't be sure about anything, Zayn." He whispers.

"All I know that I am never letting you go." With that Zayn pulls Harry into a loving kiss.

And yeah, Zayn feels like, this is a new beginning.

****

"What you-what you are staring at?" Looking deep into his husband's eyes, Harry whispers.

"You." Zayn whispers back,

They don't know how they ended up in Zayn's bedroom but hey, they aren't complaining. So now they are laying by each other's side after a heavy make out session that ended up them being topless. Their shirts scattered around them on the bed.

"Why?" Harry whispers, not wanting to break the comfortable silence in the room.

"Because-" Zayn whispers as he tucks a curl behind Harry's ear. "You are beautiful."

Zayn smiles fondly at him when he sees the blush on Harry's cheek.

He runs his index finger along his bottom lip which is now swollen and red from the heavy make out session they had just some minutes ago.

"You look more beautiful when you're blushing." He whispers as he slowly pulls Harry closer to him and gently sucks on his lips. Harry tugs on his already messy black hair making the older lad moan.

"And I love these marks on your skin." Zayn mumbles against a red a love bite before grazing his teeth over it a bit, making the younger lad whimper. Zayn smirks against the skin as he caresses Harry's man boobs.

"Zayn." Harry releases a breathy moan and pulls Zayn more closer so that the older lad is now on top of him.

"God, I will never get tired of kissing you." Zayn mumbles before kissing Harry fully on lips. He runs tougue at his bottom lip, asking for permission, which Harry grants easily.

They both moan when their tongues touch. They don't fight for dominance. Both just savour each other's taste and feel each other against themselves.

"God, you don't know how much I want you, Haz." Zayn grunts as they start grinding against each other.

"Zayn." Harry moans softly. He pushes Zayn off him softly, when he feels how they both have become hard....again.

"I-I can't." Harry whispers, sitting up on the bed. He picks his shirt that was laying beside him puts it on himself.

He doesn't look at Zayn's face.

He can't.

"Why?" Zayn asks him now sitting up on the bed as well.

"Nothing." Harry mumbles buttoning up his shirt with shaky hands.

"We both know it's not nothing Haz." Zayn says as he holds Harry's shaking hand. Harry still doesn't look at him, instead, looks down at his lap.

"Something is bothering you. Tell me what it is, love." Zayn softly says as he brings his big, pale hands to his mouth and kisses his knuckles.

And that's when Harry finally let the tears fall.

"I-I am scared, Zayn."

"Haz-"

"I-I know you're not like what you were before you lost your memory but..." Harry wipes his eyes with the free hand before continuing. "What if history repeats itself Zayn? I took it for the first time, I can't do that again."

"Harry what do you mean?" Zayn asks in a worried voice.

He really wonders how he had become so cruel to Harry.

He wants to know his past but at the same time he doesn't.

He really wishes he could smack his old self right now.

His trail of thoughts break by Harry's shaky voice.

"I-I can't have you leaving me again after we have sex."

************

*Evil Smirk*

Well, I hope after that Zarry edit you guys can forgive me a bit for me being evil? 😂

I love/loce you all. xxx