Love to Hate You • E.D.

Seven

I could hardly breathe as I raced to my car. I jumped in and sat in the driver's seat heaving. I was absolutely disgusted yet...extremely turned on.

You hate him, Ana, you do, and you always have, I tell myself while I'm driving home. Why do tears begin rolling down my cheeks, and why do I suddenly feel so...so violated?

I wipe my face with my sleeve before shutting the car off and just sitting in it, leaning my head against the headrest of the car seat, closing my eyes. Breathing in and out slowly, the scene of us in the bathroom keeps playing in my head. What if I had let him kiss me? Let him pin me up against the wall like he's done to so many other girls?

"Ana!" Mom calls from the porch, turning the light on. I see her waving me in the house, and I open the car door, lazily getting out while I shove the keys in my pocket. Walking in front of mom into the house, she hugs me before retiring to her bedroom to probably have loud, annoying, forceful sex with my dad.

Oh yay.

I go to my own room, plugging my phone in to the charger, placing it on the bed. I brush my teeth and wash my face in the bathroom before burying myself underneath the covers of my twin sized bed.

The next day the only thing I can feel is Ethan's presence. He wouldn't stop looking at me, every chance he got his eyes were glued to me. It made me squirm in my seat, it made me heated, I hated it.

I raced from one class to the next, not letting him get near me. Lord only knows what he would do if he did get a hold of me. He'd probably shove me in the janitor's closet and have his way with me.

Why did that excite me?

God Ana, you're so fucked.

"You can't hide forever, princess." Ethan says to me with a smirk when I'm on my way out the school doors. I hoist my backpack on my shoulder more, trying my best to block him out. When he doesn't leave my side, I stop in my tracks.

"I have nothing to-"

He grabs my face.

He grabs my face and he kisses me so hard yet so soft that I have no choice but to stay put. He put his hands on my forearms, squeezing them as he deepens our kiss. My head starts to spin and travel into the clouds all at once. I couldn't seem to walk away from him. He pulled away first, and I really couldn't say anything. Everything was going on as normal around us, except for the few people that had the audacity to stop and stare.

A million thoughts traveled through my head but none of them could exit my mouth. I stared at the ground huffing with anger and confusion.

"Told you you couldn't-"

Before he has the chance to finish I slam my hand across his face, causing him to hunch over. I immediately dash away from him, almost running to my car.

How dare he, how fucking dare he.

I was repulsed, humiliated, completely and utterly awestruck.

He was as dumb as he looked, he was a complete fucking idiot. But so was I for letting him fucking kiss me.

What was even more stupid was the fact that something inside of me, enjoyed it.

Oh my god Ana.

Pull yourself together!

As soon as I sat in the driver's seat, I started hitting the steering wheel until I could no longer feel my hands. I hadn't realized but I had started to cry at some point during all this. I leaned back still holding onto the steering wheel and I let out a loud exhausted breath.

Why me?

What had I done to deserve this?

Was I really that terrible of a person? Is this the thanks I got for having an ounce of actual common sense?

To get fucked over by one of the most popular and one of the biggest douchebags in the entire fucking school?

Honestly it'd be just my luck.

Suddenly there was a knocking on my window. It was Ethan. I shut my eyes tight.