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JUDGE: ShipiGee The writing of this story needs some improvement. The long paragraphs at one point of time become a bit boring n tedious for readers to read. As the story goes, it is a bit cliche dark past story. The emotions are straightforwarded in my opinion. There was no trigger warning for the abusive scenes. The author can do much better if the story can get a proofreading and beta reading done. It has a potential to grow as it looks like the author has put everything in the story at once or in one go. The story needs to breathe and be lively too even if it is a dark one.
JUDGE: mistandfuryy you write very well, but the grammar errors brought the rating down :( I would suggest going back and editing. Also, try making your chapters shorter and separating huge paragraphs. Sometimes readers leave because it's too overwhelming. I don't like your cover; it just doesn't do your writing justice! Overall, I like where the book is going! Good job (:
JUDGE: mistandfuryy Everything kind of seems really choppy in the book. You're showing the mc's thoughts, but not her feelings. I would also recommend adding some descriptions of characters/setting. There were a few grammar mistakes, but other than that, you're good. Also, I LOVE your cover!! So mysterious and elegant.
JUDGE: CrescenteFenice • Grammar – I would suggest that the author proofread some of their chapters. • Uniqueness – Honestly, the way it's written it makes it hard to understand whose point of view we are viewing it from. Someone telling the story, or the main character. So I'm not entirely sure what the plot is. • Character Building – There isn't a lot of backstory for the main character within the first three chapters. I would suggest adding more backstory, help the readers connect with the main character. • Writing Style – The way the book is put together everything just looks and feels crammed. It requires you to slow down and try to pick out what parts are coming from the main character and which parts are coming from another person in the story. Overall, the flow just isn't there. • Overall Enjoyment – A story isn't enjoyable to read when you can't understand the plot. I would suggest a clearer description within the first few chapters to describe exactly what the main characters goals are. I believe that will help the readers connect with the main character better if they understand why they are doing what they are doing. The concept, I think, is there it just needs more direction.
