When You're Ready; Shawn Mendes

Intro

"Are you sure you're not sick of me?"

•••

Avelyn

Tour the thought of it made me so excited. Being back in the air and seeing the world look so small. Being in a different perspective and just admiring how everything looked. That was my favorite part of flying, seeing where the sky met the land. Especially when the sun goes down or rises and how the colors paint the sky. For mother's nature an artist and the sky's her canvas.

Tonight we're leaving to Europe and I felt the excitement. I danced around my room as I picked what I was going to take on tour. I wanted to take cute clothes but also ones that I could mix and match creating new outfits but not to where it looked weird.

I was on my second suitcase and I still needed to pack shoes and my makeup. I still had a lot to pack but couldn't pack everything, I wasn't moving.

"Avelyn?" I heard Shawn call as my front door closed.

"In my room!" I yelled over my music.

I then seen him walk in and looked around my room, "Uh you are going to be done by the time we leave tonight right?"

I set my hands on my hips and let out my breath, "Yes and no. I have a problem."

"And what is this problem? Is it the fact that your room looks like a tornado hit?" He joked as me sat down on my bed.

I glared at him, "No, my problem is I don't want to take a lot of stuff yet I don't have all of my stuff packed. So how do I do this, how do you pack for tour?"

He chuckled, "It didn't occur to you to see my fans teasing me about my repeating outfits that I am probably the worst person to ask for packing advice."

"Well I have no idea what I am going to do and as for the teasing maybe you should stop being an outfit repeater Lizzie McGuire." I told him hoping he'd get the reference.

"Ha Ha I've heard that one already so nice try." He told me trying to sound annoyed but had that smile still on his face.

"I never had this problem last tour, why can't I decide?" I asked.

He chuckled, "Ave you know we're doing the Europe leg first then we'll have a break. You don't need to pack for the whole tour, you realized that right?"

"Uh yeah, of course." I played it off but I guess I was just too excited that I forgot it wasn't all of tour I was packing for.

I ended up emptying the almost full second suitcase and filling it with my shoes and other necessities. Once I was done packing I decided to clean my room and put everything back. I wanted to get back home and come to a clean apartment rather than a mess I'll be too tired to clean.

"Are you hungry?" Shawn asked as he sat on my nicely made bed.

I looked over at him from my closet and then down at my watch. It was already five in the afternoon, where the hell was time going?

"Yeah." I answered quickly.

"Great what do you want?" He asked.

I shrugged, "Whatever."

It was a little silent and I'm not actually sure why. I looked over at him and his eyes were already on me. I raised my eyebrow in question.

"Are you okay? You're staring." I laughed.

He nodded and just gave me that warm smile, "Yeah, are you?"

"Yeah why wouldn't I be?" I asked.

"I don't know you just seemed a little off when I asked you if you wanted to eat. Are you concerned about anything with tour?" Shawn asked me as he got up and leaned against my closet door.

I looked at him and shook my head at first. But there was a thought that was bothering me. It's one that came from my insecurities, the thoughts I really try and not listen to.

"Come on Avelyn, what's wrong?" He asked me as he bent down so we were leveled since I was sitting on the floor.

"It's nothing, I just allowed my dumb thoughts to get to me. That's all." I told him.

He moved my hair out of my face, "Tell me."

"It's just...don't you think you'll get tired of me? Like being on tour with me? I would get tired of me." I told him softly.

I couldn't even look at him, that's how awful I felt. And it had nothing to do with him, I've always had this problem. Since high school really, just this doubt that no one could love you and your thoughts just repeating that to you.

"Avelyn I fought hard not to lose you for a year. I pushed down my feelings for you for an entire year just so that you could be happy. I love spending time with you, I mean it's not like we're glued to the hip. We've hardly seen each other in the past few months. So no, I am not going to get sick of you." He explained to me as he held my chin to make me look at him.

"Promise?" I asked needing that reassurance.

He chuckled, "I promise."

"So I was thinking burgers." I told him breaking whatever this was.

He smiled big, "Burgers it is, I'll go get it." He said before kissing my forehead.

He then grabbed his phone and made sure he had his keys before leaving. I heard my front door close and I laid back on my cold hardwood floor. I stared up at the ceiling lost in thought.

Even with his reassurance I still had those ugly thoughts. I wished they'd go away, but they haunted me. We've been dating for eight months and these thoughts are barley hitting me.

And I'm not sure why.

Authors Note//
I can't let go of Avelyn and Shawn so here's a third book
Let me know what you think
Until Next Time Peace Lovelies✌🏼💚