DIPHYLLEIA GRAYI(SORAMAFU)

23

I'm tired.

         Soraru had been skipping classes, staying at home as he tried to get up and get through his days like usual. He wasn't always like this, but he did not know what had came over him. He had picked up a habit of cutting himself all over again, and stopped eating. He didn't know what came over him. He just knew that he is tired, and sad, and hungry, but he had no appetite and no energy.

       He supposed that it had something to do with the man that is appearing in his thoughts after a few months of disappearing. The man was always masked, and he was appearing everywhere in classes last week, causing him to feel scared to go back to university. Now, Soraru sat on his bed, his blankets draped over his shoulders and a pillow held tight to his chest. He was staring blankly at the wall, dressed in all black. A weird sort of ringing filled his ears and he whimpered, falling on his bed bonelessly.
           He was weak, he supposed. He lets the masked man- whom he called Ren- boss him around, but it wasn't really his fault. Ren had been around ever since last time, always appearing at night, always ready with a gentle word whenever he was crying. He started to get aggressive when Soraru's thoughts get a dark turn, always urging him to do all sorts of harm to himself. He had tried to get help- by telling his friends about it and getting his family members' help, but they had all thought that he is crazy. Soraru was so mentally tired and torn, that he eventually listened to Ren's words. The man never told him his actual name, he just lets the other call him whatever he wants. He is gentle, and loving, and eventually...

Eventually, Soraru fell in love with this man, this stranger casted by his mind.
          

a/n : this man actually exists irl, but not in physical form. he is one of the reasons i become me now. he is one of the reasons i hate myself so much, and he is also one of the reasons i learn to accept myself for the flaws i have.
-aru