Saved In The A.M.

12-If I Could Fly

———HARRY'S POV———
"What the hell are you doing here Zayn, you made it fucking clear you had no respect for us anymore, you hurt Louis the most out of all of us, you two were best fucking friends" I say now standing up, hissing at him as to not wake Niall or Liam sleeping in the other chairs in the room. "You left when he needed you the most" I poke his chest "without a fucking word or explanation, and now you're back? Like you care? Please." I continue to spit poison infested words at him like he's a disease.

"Uh L-Liam called me" he barely manages to stutter out probably shocked to see this side of me since I never get mad like this.
"Well we all know you don't care so thanks for coming but you can leave now" I say with a sarcastic smirk on my face and scrunched up nose showing that I find it humorous that he even turned up after not speaking a word to us the last couple months let alone taking digs at us in interviews.

"Zayn? Is that you lad?" I hear a sleepy Niall say and Zayn turns around, leaving our conversation like he left the band.
"Hey Ni how are you" he asks as he extends his hand to which Niall pushes away making me laugh to myself but instead getting up and hugging him which causes my jaw to drop slightly I roll my eyes, Niall and Liam never have never been people to hold a grudge.
"Honestly, I'm not doing too well, I'm scared and I hate myself for not helping before it got to this" he confesses.
"There's nothing you could have done, Louis would have done whatever he could to hide it." Zayn comforts him.
"No Zayn" he says looking down to fiddle with a loose string on his jumper. "Harry told me and Liam something was wrong but we just brushed it off and now look what's happened" He looks back up at Zayn teary eyed to which Zayn embraces him in another hug.
"It's okay Ni, it was just denial, it's natural to not want to believe it, not wanting to deal with it, not knowing how" he reassures him.

I walk around the bed and rub Liam's shoulder then gently shaking it in an effort to wake him up, he looks so peaceful when he sleeps, kind of like a puppy.
"Wake up" I say quietly in his ear as I reach around the back of him and rest my hand in the crook of his neck.
"Hmm" he mumbles as he blinks his eyes open.
"Zayn is here" I inform him which causes him to sit up straight, bringing him to attention. He wipes his face as he stands up and places a hand on Zayn's shoulder.

"Alright mate" he says croaky voiced but smiling, Zayn turns around to face him and Liam pulls him into a hug.
"Liam" Zayn states as wraps his arms around the dip in Liam's spine.
"Good to see you lad" Liam says pulling him in by his neck with one hand and patting his back with the other hand. Their hug lingers a bit longer than a normal one would, making up for all the missed ones and as a silent sorry from not remaining in contact like they promised they would. Liam tends not to sever ties, he prefers to stay in contact and at least try not to give up on the relationship, I haven't quite figured out if it's maturity, trying to set a good example for the rest of us as Daddy Direction or if it really is just the way he is as a person.

Zayn turns to face me now.
"Harry" he says, looking for forgiveness but he doesn't fucking deserve it, if he wants forgiveness he needs to earn it, it's his act that got the love of my life into this mess and I just roll my eyes and lean against the wall crossing my arms over my chest sighing, as if reading my mind he starts to apologise.

"There's no excuse for the way I've been acting these last few months, I know you're mad at me because I left without really an explanation and being mad helps you deal with it and blaming me for Louis' situation takes some of the stress off yourself that you're under at the moment. I know you know I wasn't enjoying my time in the band towards the end, but it's nothing personal, I love you lads, you're my brothers but I couldn't stay, I myself developed an eating disorder from the stress of management and the need to always provide, I just needed to be released, I felt trapped. I know I talked some shit in interviews but I was mad because I did what I had to do and everyone just turned against me because of it then Perrie and I broke up and everything just kept going downhill so I didn't really care what I said anymore since I had no real friends left anyway. Harry I'm so sorry for everything, I know I don't deserve it and I'll understand if you can't but I'm asking for forgiveness, for Louis, I want to be there for him without you wanting to strangle me whenever we're in the same room, I can see it on your face right now." I immediately changed my facial expression. "I'm so sorry, I truly am and you have no idea how much I regret how I left things, please somehow find it in your heart to forgive me."