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"SHOULD I?" HE ASKED. "Like I feel like I should go but at the same time, I feel like I shouldn't," he added with a shrug. James had been offered an opportunity to play football in Europe- a chance not necessarily everyone really got.
"Of course James," she smiled. Natalia didn't want her best friend to move all the way to Europe, Portugal to be exact. But she wanted him to be successful, she wanted to see him be happy. "I mean how could you give up this opportunity? Not everyone gets this opportunity, James."
James didn't know if moving to Portugal, to play for Porto FC was what he wanted. He didn't want to leave his family or his best friend. He had played for different teams before, but they had always be within South America- near his beloved Colombia. Moving to Europe, would be a big change for him. A change he wasn't sure he was ready for.
"James you've worked for this, very hard. To be recognized by bigger teams. This is something you really have to think about," she smiled. "Just know I will support any decision you make."
Natalia had always been there for every step in his life. No matter how bad his actions or decisions affected her, she was always there.
Always there to support him during his games; even if it meant being stuck in an airplane for 16 or more hours from Colombia to Portugal to watch him play or to answering his midnight calls to hear him talk about how he missed her and his family; and to ask if he had watched his match. Which was a yes, always.
Natalia was always with him, in many ways. Even when they weren't together she always supported him, and always wished the best for him.
She felt guilty for not being able to comfort James when Colombia has lost against Brazil during the semifinals of the World Cup 2014. She could remember seeing James cry his eyes out- knowing she couldn't do anything to make him happy. She saw James cry, knowing that he was blaming himself for not doing more. But he had done everything, everyone was proud of their Golden Boy.
How she wished she could've been strong enough to call him after the match to tell him everything would be better, to overall comfort him. But she didn't.
Natalia still felt guilty for that, she felt that if she would've called him- it might've helped him, but it also could've fixed them.
She just watched her television, seeing all the Colombian players cry at how they're chance to the final had disappeared. Natalia felt her heart break as she saw him breakdown with tears; nothing could ever be more painful than seeing him like that.
He was the footballer who everyone had fallen in love with during the World Cup; how could someone's heart not break seeing him like that. James felt that he let down his entire country, but he felt like he let down himself. He felt that he could've done more for his country.
James wasn't the only one who felt that way; Natalia felt like he had let him down too. Not only was she his ex-girlfriend; but she was his best friend at one point, and she should've been there for him.
Seeing that James' dream of winning the World Cup had been shattered by losing to Brazil- reminded her of the countless of times that they would talk about James going to the World Cup and winning it. Witnessing James' chance of making his come true dream disappear made her heart break even more.
"I hope that one day Colombia makes it to the World Cup, Nata. And that day, I hope to be playing for our country wearing the number ten jersey," he smiled. "And that you'll be supporting me wearing my jersey in the stands."
James, who was seventeen at the time, always dreamed big. He had that positivity that easily gave you hope, he had a spirit that no one could break. His dream was to take his country to World Cup one day.
"Of course," she smiled. "With you on the national team, anything will be possible."
But who knew that five years later, his dream would actually come true. James took his country to the World Cup; something the Colombian national team hadn't achieved in years. The only part of his dream that had not come true was the part about her being in the stands. But the rest was all true, she was supporting him wearing her country's bright yellow jersey with James and the number 10 on the back.
Natalia would always think back to the night where everything had changed for them. If she would've just agreed with him about moving to Germany, their lives would be they way she wanted it to be.
They would still be together, maybe they would've thought about having children soon or the possibility of getting married. James had always told her that he wanted to marry her first, and then have children with her, only to show her that he would always be there for her and that he would never leave her.
James had many dreams, one of them was to be able to take his country to the World Cup. But he also had personal dreams of his own. Which was to be able to making a family of his own; to have a beautiful daughter or son.
He loved the idea of having a son or daughter who he could spoil and spend time with to teach them how to play football.
But it seemed like whenever he tried to fall in love with someone- it never worked. Maybe it was because they weren't Natalia, no one could ever compare to his Natalia. He couldn't fall in love with someone else when he knew that his heart belonged to the same girl who had stole it when he was only fifteen.
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i hope the way i wrote this chapter didn't confuse you haha. lowkey this chapter made no sense lmfao. (and was really short, sorry about that.)
