He's My Cousin!

[Ch.41] Chance

[Ch.41] Chance

// Ayanna's Point of View

Nakatingin lang ako kay Paolo noong mga sandaling iyon. Nakita ko pang napatingin sa akin si Jiro mula sa peripheral vision ko pero 'di ko na siya nagawang lingunin.

Hindi ko nagawang gumalaw. Hindi ko nagawang umiyak. Hindi ko nagawang hatakin si Paolo palayo sa lugar na iyon. Hindi ko magawang ipamukha kay Ate Abby that Paolo's mine. I was just there, and there was no way I could do something about whatever was happening right in front of me.

'Yung makita ko lang na 'yung lalaking mahal ko ay kasama ang babaeng minsan niyang minahal... it was just too painful to bear. I wanted to believe that Paolo loves me the same way I love him. Talong-talo ako rito eh, and it was my only consolation— 'yung assurance niyang ako ang mahal niya. Pero ngayong si Ate Abby ang kasama niya, paano kung...? Ayoko nang isipin pa.

I trust Paolo— I'm a hundred percent sure about that— but I don't know about Ate Abby. Alam kong mahal niya pa si Paolo hanggang ngayon, and that made me more anxious to see them together.

"Long time no see, Aya!" masiglang bati ni Ate Abby sa akin. She's definitely way happier today than the last time I talked to her. A part of me was so sure that it was all because of Paolo. At ang sakit para sa akin no'n— na habang ako nagtitiis na magkalayo kami ni Paolo sa isa't isa siya naman ay masayang kasama 'yung lalaking mahal ko. It's unfair. "Kumusta? 'Di ka na yata sumasama kay Pao 'pag pumupuntang RC?"

"Medyo busy kasi sa univ, e," pagdadahilan ko. "Kayo, k-kumusta?" I tried to act and speak normally.

"We're good. Aso't pusa pa nga rin pala hanggang ngayon si Sidney at Riyu!" she said, chuckling as she was talking about my other cousin, Ate Sky. Matagal-tagal ko na ring hindi nakaka-usap ang isang 'yun. I guess I was pretty filled up with distractions and worries that I forget things I usually do way back then... noong maayos pa ang lahat.

Nakita kong napatingin si Ate Abby kay Jiro na nasa tabi ko. Naglaro ang ngisi sa mga labi niya na para bang may nakita siya interesante. "So... who's the guy?" sabi niya nang iminuestra niya si Jiro habang itinataas-taas niya ang kilay niya.

And I get why she's acting that way. She thinks Jiro and I were on I date. Siguro nga ay kung may makakakita sa amin na kahit hindi kami kilala ay iyon ang iisipin. Ang hindi alam ni Ate Abby, the guy she was currently with was the same guy I would have wanted to be with.

I know it was wrong, but I swear to God, nang makita ko ang ngiti sa mga labi niya, I wanted to slap her real hard.

Oo, naging malapit na rin sa akin si Ate Abby at naiinis din ako sa sarili ko kung bakit pinagi-isipan ko siya nang masa. Naging kaibigan ko rin siya, natatandaan ko iyon. Pero kahit anong close namin, kahit gaano kami kakumportable sa isa't isa, kahit na gaano lumalim ang pagkakaibigan namin, I can never ever share the guy I love with her. I know it's petty— to react and feel like this just because I saw them together; they weren't even holding hands or kissing or whatnot... But, when it comes to Paolo, I become selfish, possessive and senseless.

And I can't fight it.

"Si Jiro," pagpapakilala ko. "Jiro, si Ate Abby." Binigyan ko siya nang matabang na ngiti.