Travel // Shawn Mendes

thirty-three

Jen bursts laughing.

"Caleb, we were talking about Xander, not Xavier. From Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Nice to know you pay attention."

I risk a glance at Shawn, who's expression was still unreadable, and then look at Xavier, who was smiling.

"Actually, I think I remember you talking about him a few times in high school," he says, and I laugh.

"Don't judge me! He's a legend," I defend myself.

In reality, while I had watched Buffy with Jen in eighth grade, she and I both hated Xander, and thought he was the most disappointing character on this earth. Still, that was the only lie she could have thought of, so I was going to have to change my whole opinion on him and keep the lie going until the grave.

"What are you doing here?" Jen asks Xavier, moving the conversation, and he shrugs.

"My little sister likes the singer, and my mom didn't want her to go alone, so I'm stuck here. What about you? You don't seem the type to like this kind of music," he says, and she shakes her head.

"All Nora. She got me into Sarah's songs," Jen admits.

"Of course she did. Nora's always getting people to try new things," he says with a smirk, and I can tell he's thinking about junior year when I had dared him to come to school in just his boxers, and he actually did it. Our first period teacher had yelled at him, but everyone could tell she didn't mind the sight.

Jen laughs, recalling the same memory, and as they talk I notice that Shawn was staring at me.

I raise an eyebrow at him, wanting to know what was up, but he stays silent.

"Hey, Shawn and I are going to go get ourselves drinks before Sarah comes out. Be right back," I tell the group, and walk away, hoping that Shawn was behind me.

"What?" I ask Shawn after we turn a corner, and he shakes his head.

"I didn't say anything."

"Yeah, but you're acting weird."

"How would you know?" He didn't mean it offensively, but for some reason the question hurts a bit.

"Because I know you," I say, deciding to lean back on the wall.

"You look like you know Xavier a bit more," he says, and I can feel my cheeks heat up.

Was he serious right now? He was the one with Lolah.

"We're friends, Shawn."

"He used to like you," Shawn points out, and I shake my head.

"That doesn't mean he does anymore! I haven't even spoken to him all summer!" I say. Partial lie, because I did text him a happy birthday message while I was in Spain.

"Whatever," he says, his face still blank. He starts to walk off, but I grab his arm.

"Not whatever. I can't believe you're getting jealous now when you literally have a thing with Lolah," I huff, angry.

Well shit, that wasn't how I wanted to ask him about it at all.

"I'm not j- what? Lolah? Who said I was with Lolah?" His expression changes into a real one, a confused one, and I shake my head.

"Whatever," I use his own words against him, and it's clear that he doesn't like it.

"Did you seriously think I would try to- I'm not with Lolah. I don't want to be with her. God damn it, Nora, I want to be with you," he looked tired, and borderline angry that I had thought he was with Lolah.

Woah.

It was time to say something, and Shawn was waiting for my response, but my mind had gone blank, so I draw up the only two words I think I could have said.

"You do?"

He lets out an airy laugh, running his hand through his hair, and in the background I can hear the small crowd cheering, so I know that Sarah Wilson was on stage. Still, I didn't move.

"Yes, I do. I have since the moment I met you. And you know what, I am jealous. I was jealous when I saw you hugging that guy because I wanted him to be me, I was jealous when you were laughing at what he was saying, and when your mom told us that story, I was jealous that he got the chance to kiss you and I didn't," the words come out of Shawn's mouth quickly, as if he couldn't stop them, and I stand in front of him in shock.

"You had the chance in my room," I mention, and mentally bang my head against the wall. Really, Nora? After he says all that, that's your answer?

"Yeah, I guess I did," he says, thinking that my response was a soft rejection.

"And," I add, "I think there might be another opening coming up shortly."

Shawn looks up from the floor, and that's all it takes. I lean in, and our lips slowly meet. At first it was soft, like we were testing the waters out, but that phase passed. Shawn grips my waist, pulling me closer, and his lips press against mine more urgently. I place my hands on the sides of his head, one resting on his cheek as the other combed through his hair.

We disconnect for air, both of us out of breath, and Shawn leans his head by my cheek.

"I think that was the best kiss I've ever been a part of," Shawn whispers, his breath hot on my neck, and I nod my head, incapable of words for a moment.

"Yeah, same here," I finally let out.

"Should I come back later, or?" I turn my head sharply to see Jen standing at the other side of the hall, a smirk on her face, and my face goes red.

We're in a public place, I realize. What if somebody had taken a picture, or video? Jen was the only one in the hall, but that didn't mean that nobody else had stood at the corner with their camera.

Shawn, however, doesn't seem to care, and stares at me for a moment longer before wrapping an arm around my waist and walking with me to Jen.

My best friend stays behind us, and when I turn to look at her she has two thumbs up in the air, a wide smile on her face as she excitedly dances for me.

We walk over to the nearest table to the pit, having a bit of a hard time getting there since the lights were turned down at the actual concert area. Caleb was sitting there, on his phone, waiting for Jen. I smiled at him as he looked up, and he smiled back before continuing to scroll through his Instagram feed.

Jen came back, and Sarah started another song that I knew was Jen's favorite. We begin to sing along to it and Shawn laughs at us and so does Caleb, and as the songs continue I realize that this was possibly one of the best nights of my life.