Not So Normal

Chapter 68

~Niall's POV~

   I can't stand the fact that I'll be spending Christmas without Elissa this year. After Christmas last year, I thought we would spend every Christmas after that together. I never would have guessed that I would be the cause for spending Christmas apart. I know Elissa won't want me to, but I place all the blame on myself. Me and my irresponsibility.

   It is nice to be home with my family for the holidays, but I miss the love of my life. I haven't told any of my family the real reason Elissa isn't here. None of them know about the recent...events surrounding my relationship. They think that Elissa and I are still happily engaged and that Elissa is just spending the holidays with family that she hasn't seen in a really long time. As much as I hate lying to my family, they really don't need to hear the truth.

   I have to spend all of Christmas Eve morning and afternoon helping my mum prepare for our big Christmas Eve dinner with all the family. It's been a tradition in the family for years to gather all the family- aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, you name it- for dinner on Christmas Eve. Then everyone stays the night and we open presents and have a big breakfast Christmas morning. This year there's going to be more people than last time I spent Christmas with my family because all the other families have grown in the last couple years. I really need to spend more time with my family; I'm starting to not know who people are.

   When family starts showing up at our house, it's my job to greet them all and help them settle in. Everyone is so excited to see me, so I have to act really happy to see everyone. There are a few people that I'm genuinely happy to see, but most of these family members get fake smiles.

   After everyone has arrived, we all gather in the garage, where Mum has set up tables and all the food. We spend the next couple hours eating and socializing over the food. Everyone talks to me about how One Direction is going, or how Elissa is doing, or even how Eleanor is, which I find very random. I feel a little pang in my heart every time Elissa is mentioned, but I manage to keep myself together long enough that no one sees when I break down.

   At some point in the evening, Mum realizes that she doesn't have some kitchen thing she really needs for breakfast tomorrow, so she sends me to the store to get it. I drive to the store, and then I just sit in my car and completely fall apart.

   Tears stream down my cheeks while my emotions just run wild. I have no idea what to do about this. I don't know why I can't control my emotions. I guess this was bound to happen eventually, but I still wasn't expecting it, so I'm not prepared for this. Maybe I'll have Elissa help me with emotional stablilization sometime. Then again, I don't know if she's the best choice for emotional health advice.

   For as much as she has been through, I find it perfectly reasonable that Elissa is in the mental/emotional state that she is. While I don't condone self-harm or suicide in any way, I find her reasons for it fairly justifiable. I would probably do the same if the events in her life were instead in mine. I just hate to be the reason for her most recent emotional instability. I know she's been better lately, but I think I'm going to try and get her to go see a therapist sometime. It would probably help her a lot.

   I manage to get out of my car and go find what my mum needed at the store. I chat with the lady at the register for a minute and then head back home. I give the stuff to my mum and then sit down at the kitchen table.

   "I think it's time for you to go to bed, sweetheart. You don't look so good," she says, rubbing my back and giving me a knowing expression. My face must still be red from crying earlier.

   I gladly listen, and I head upstairs to my bedroom, away from everyone else. I quickly fall asleep, not wanting Christmas without Elissa to come.

   Much to my dismay, I get woken up early the next morning by Theo and the rest of the little kids. They all drag me downstairs to the living room, where everyone is waiting, surrounded by colorfully wrapped gifts. I sit in a corner and sulk while everyone else happily opens presents. I gladly take the opportunity to leave the room when Mum asks me to check on the cinnamon rolls in the oven.

   While I'm in the kitchen, I hear the doorbell ring. That's really odd. No one ever comes by on Christmas morning. I go back out into the living room just as Theo opens the front door. Everyone goes silent, including me, when they see who it is.

   "Merry Christmas, Niall," Elissa whispers. I immediately run to her and wrap my arms around her. In a matter of seconds we're both crying. Mum must know something is up because she quietly has everyone leave the room and go eat breakfast.

   I take Elissa's hand and pull her to the couch to sit down. She curls up against me and I run my fingers through her hair. We're both silent for a minute, and then she is the first one to speak.

   "I couldn't stand the thought of spending Christmas without you," she whispers, a single tear falling down her cheek. "I never want to spend a Christmas without the love of my life."

   "We won't ever spend Christmas apart," I whisper back. I lift Elissa's chin up so I'm looking into her eyes.

   "I missed you, Niall."

   "I missed you more," I reply, pressing my lips softly against hers. The kiss only lasts a few seconds, but when we pull apart, we're both smiling. This is when I take the opportunity to re-propose. I get down on one knee and pull Elissa's ring out of my pocket, where I've kept it since I got to Ireland. I didn't want people to ask what was on my necklace, which is where it was before.

   "Elissa, I still want to spend the rest of my life with you. I swear I will never mess it all up like this again, and I will take care of you and never let you hurt so much again. I'll-"

   "Of course I'll still marry you," Elissa cuts me off, kissing me. While our lips are locked, I slide the ring onto her finger. We only pull apart when Theo walks in and giggles when he sees us. When he realizes that he has been seen, he runs back to the kitchen.

   "I think we should probably explain this to your family," Elissa says.

   "I suppose that's probably a good idea. Anyone would be a bit confused at this scene if they didn't know what was going on," I say with a light laugh.

   We get up from the couch and go join my family in the kitchen. When they see us walk in, everyone goes quiet and looks at us expectantly.

   "How about all little ones go play with your toys by the Christmas tree, okay?" Mum says, ushering all the kids out, leaving only people above the age of 15 in the kitchen.

   "You've got some explaining to do," Greg says. Elissa and I look at each other and begin the crazy story that sums up the last month of our lives.

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Yay, an update! I'm happy Nissa is back together :)

So I think this story is coming to a close. Maybe 10 or so more chapters. It's been great writing for you guys! :)

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