50 Shades of Silver

Shade 44

Silvertongue narrowed his eyes as he clicked on the news icon on his phone. 

Silvertongue: *rubs his paws together apprehensively; to himself* Time to do some learning! Amethystglimmer will never be able to resist an educated man!

The screen loads, and Silvertongue clicks on the top headline.

Silvertongue: *squints* CG accepting admins? I don't care about that! *swipes to the next one* Ew, ties on cats is the newest trend? What kind of Twoleg would think that's a good idea?!? *shivers and swipes* Hmm, this looks interesting. *clicks his tongue* How to get a pretty she-cat to love you even when you've been pathetically chasing her for over 40 chapters.

Silvertongue reads the first bullet point.

Silvertongue: Play loud Disney music to her... Perfect

Some time later...
Silvertongue dances into the camp, holding his phone and Bluetooth speaker.

Silvertongue: Good morning everyone! *grins brightly*

Toadpaw: *squints* Oh no, you're one of those obnoxious people who plays music on a Bluetooth speaker in the subway.

Silvertongue: Huh?

Toadpaw: Sorry, I sometimes start to talk like a cat from my past life. *adjusts his tie*

Silvertongue: Alright then. *glances over at the warriors den* Have you seen Amethystglimmer?

Toadpaw: Yeah, she's off making off with her new boyfriend. *points toward the nursery*

Silvertongue: Cool. *walks off toward where Toadpaw pointed.*

Amethystglimmer is grooming her new boyfriend's pelt and looks up as Silvertongue approaches.

Amethystglimmer: Look, Blackshadow, it's the idiot I was telling you about.

Blackshadow: *brushes his swoosh out of his eyes* Yeah, cool. *looks up at Silvertongue* Ew, it's a rat - nope it's just an idiot trying to get my girlfriend to fall in love with him with his pathetic plans that always fail drastically.

Amethystglimmer: *laughs* That's so accurate!

Silvertongue: *sticks his tongue out* Well at least my name isn't Blackshadow!

Blackshadow: *shrugs nonchalantly* My name reflects my true spirit - your tongue isn't silver. Who's really the liar now?

Silvertongue: *sighs and ignores the stupid tom.* Whatever. Amethystglimmer? *turns toward her*

Amethystglimmer: What do you want?

Silvertongue: *sets down his speaker and unlocks his phone.* I want to play you a song. *closes his eyes, and a muted song starts to play from his phone.* No, you stupid thing! *slams his paw against the screen* Speaker! Bluetooth speaker!

"Love is an Open Door" starts to blast from the apprentice den.

Silvertongue: No, not that speaker! *curses as he tries to switch the device* 

Blackshadow: Just give up now, Pinktongue.

Silvertongue: *flops to the ground* This is pointless. Amethystglimmer will never love me!

Amethystglimmer: Thanks Captain Obvious.

Silvertongue: *continuing* And I'll be alone forever, in my mancave.

Blackshadow: You have a man cave? Lucky!

Silvertongue: *ears swivel toward the tom.* You want to come see? I finished setting up my new collection of catnip vapes today!

Blackshadow: Yo, that's so sick! Let's go! *leaves Amethystglimmer*

The toms rush out of camp, leaving the Bluetooth speaker behind. Frozen music starts to pour out as they leave.

by rio, who is currently listening to disney