Diagnosis // Yoonmin ff

Chapter Seven

I was always bad at lying. That was one of the biggest reasons why I decided to text my mom and tell her that I'll be staying the night at Jungkook's place instead of just giving her a call which in her case is much easier. Most of the time she does not check her phone for notifications, but hopefully this time she will see it before starting to panic because her son is not at home. 

Suga invited me to stay the night at his place which I could not refuse. This is once in a lifetime opportunity for me to get closer to the said boy. He mentioned that there was only one bed which we would probably share, not that I mind. I wasn't having any dirty thoughts about this night. I just wish to sleep in his embrace. That would be the best feeling ever. 

To say that I wasn't nervous would be a huge lie but it was still very exciting. My heart was beating so loud that I wouldn't be surprised if Suga was able to hear it as well. Putting my phone away now that I have finished texting my mom, my attention was once again drawn to the boy who was sitting across me. He was about to dry his hair but I insisted on doing it for him.

Sitting behind the said boy, holding the hairdryer in my right hand as I kept stroking his hair with my other hand, I enjoyed every moment. The smell of his shampoo reminded me of my childhood and those days I spent playing in the park with Jungkook, coming back home covered in nothing but mud. It smelled exactly like the grass after the rain. Some may tell that it is a weird way to describe it, but to me, that smell was the most calming and memorable. I would also tell that it may be because the color of it matched the grass itself, but my mysterious mint boy dyed his hair again for God knows how many times. It was dark now as the sky once the sun settles and it's left alone. I wonder if that's how Suga felt as well. Lonely? He did seem that way when we first met. His eyes screamed of darkness and emptiness. But now that I am here, I will have that changed. I will bring the sun back into your life. Just let me into that heart of yours.  

Not long after I finish drying his hair, Suga disappeared into one of the rooms which I assume is the bedroom. It didn't take him long before he came back telling me that he prepared the bed for us to sleep in case I was tired. Telling him that it would be the best for us to rest considering it was a long day and I had school tomorrow, he took me by the hand and lead to the said room. 

The next day, at school, I was greeted with Ms. Jang and her famous quick exam which she loved to give to her students when you least expect it. I stared at the paper sheet in front of me both numbers and letters getting mixed up. When did the math get this complicated? 

It didn't take me longer than 15 minutes to finish it considering how little I knew. The rest of the call went by me staring at the clock that was hanging above the blackboard and tapping my pencil against the wooden desk beneath my arms. "I should really start studying more but how do I accomplish that with Suga being around me?" I asked myself with a heavy sigh. 

As soon as the bell rang, I handed my exam to the teacher and got out of the classroom the fastest I could. The amount I finished on the exam should be enough for a weak B or at least that what I hope for. Roaming through the mass of students, my eyes landed on the brown-haired guy with an alien smile standing not far away in front of me. Once our eyes locked, he waved at me signaling to join him. 

"How did you do it?" asked Taehyung.

"Awful? You know I hate math." I answered with a sigh, leaning my back against the lockers as Taehyung finished putting his book back in it. 

"But doesn't that Namjoon guy help you with it?" 

"Well yeah, but not much since I spend most of my time with Suga."

"Ohh... That peppermint of yours," he nodded while throwing his backpack over right shoulder signaling me to start moving towards the exit. 

"He's not peppermint anymore," I said a huge smile crossing my lips as I recalled last night. 

"Doesn't matter. I'll still call him that way." Taehyung shrugged his shoulders looking ahead. Once we were out, I narrowed my eyes at sudden amount of brightness. Seems it didn't bother Taehyung much since he immediately noticed Jungkook by the gate making him almost run to the said boy connecting their lips into a short kiss. 

"Ooooohhh..."  I smirked at them remembering how not long ago they were denying that there was anything going on between the two. "Aren't you scared? We're at school after all. Jungkook, you know that many girls are after you."

"I don't care. I love him." he looked at Taehyung and claimed his lips once again. "So sweet..." I thought, looking at the two boys in front of me. I am so happy for them. They were finally able to accept their true feeling and move on towards their happiness. If only Suga and I could do the same. 

When I arrived at work later that day, Suga was already there waiting for me. He greeted me with a big smile, eyes sparkling as he spoke with me. I did my daily routine while staling glanced at the dark-haired boy who sat at one of the chairs next to the counter waiting for me to come back behind it and take my attention back to him. 

Days kept passing with each of them making me more and more attracted to Suga. He became a regular at the ball. Almost as if he was working there with me. We spoke, laughed, joked, drank together, even tho in most cases it was he who drank alcohol while I had to satisfy myself with an orange juice. He still kept me company during my lunch breaks and our walks after work became more often.

Is it really possible to love someone this much?

I have a feeling that when he's beside me, I could achieve anything. He gave me the wings to finally be able to fly. I felt warm around my heart just with his presence next to me. At every small contact of our bodies, I would find something in my stomach twist. I believed that all of it was happening out of my love for him. Ever since day one, I wasn't able to control these feelings I get every time I think or see him. 

But I don't see that in him. That scares me the most and breaks me apart. It breaks me that there is a possibility that he doesn't love me back. All this time, he never mentioned anything about him feeling or how he sees me. I could be only a good friend for him or maybe even a brother. I don't think I would be able to get over it if he confessed to me that he doesn't see me as anything more than someone to spend time with. I don't want this love to be one-sided...

One thing I also noticed about Suga, he has a lot of secrets which he hides from me. When we walk outside, I feel like he constantly has his guard on. As if he is hiding from someone. He keeps his eyes all over the place, not paying much attention to me as he usually does when we are alone. When we are at his place, which is most of the time we spent together, he is the sweetest to me. His house became almost like mine. I knew where everything was even if you covered my eyes. 

I also noticed that he often has nightmares. He probably got that from his dad. But he never spoke about it nor anything that bothered him. It saddened me a lot. I loved him enormously and I wished if he could open up his heart to me. Even if he doesn't tell me anything, I still can feel when something is wrong, which was the case now. I am sure that he is hiding something from me. I tried to get rid of these thoughts before, but the feeling is just way stronger than me. 

He's hiding something from me, and that something isn't good...