Behind The Scenes: Book Two || Jihope

XVI: Mean Tweets

With the thousands and thousands of notifications Bangtan gets on their social media, one would think that they do not read them all and while a part of that is true, they do see most of them, specially if they get tagged. Most of their notifications included nothing but loving words. Congratulating them, wishing them well, reassuring just how much they had touched people's lives. Jimin was probably the one who read the most tweets out of the seven of them. He loved to see the small messages they received on a daily basis. Full of love and wonder, he wished he could meet all those people whose hearts had a little space reserved for him and for the rest of BTS. However, the problem with reading everything that got posted on social media was the fact that Jimin as much as his brothers is human and is human nature to always focus in the bad things over the good ones. 

No matter how many loving messages Jimin read, his mind always remembered the ones that insulted him. Words like pig, fat, talentless or idiot lingered in his mind for weeks. If he thought about it, being fat or looking like a pig wasn't anything new for him. He had known that since he was told to lose weight when he was a trainee. He felt the same way when the pressure of public opinion was applied on him when they debuted. *No More Dream has a part where he lifts up his shirt, therefore he needed to be in the best shape ever. Otherwise, how could he possibly compete with *Oh Sehun, *Choi Minho, *Jay Park, *Taeyang and all those other idols who always showed off their perfect bodies and were admired for both their looks and their talents. Idiot? Jimin didn't consider himself to be one. For sure he had acted like one a few times, but he was not an idiot. Or was he? Maybe he should give it a deeper thought some time. Talentless? Jimin was never sure. Sometimes he shined bright, some other times he flopped terribly.

The thing that made him doubt so much was the fact that he was never the number one something within the group: Number one singer: Jungkook. Number one dancer: J Hope. Number one rapper: Namjoon. Number one producer: Suga. Number one visual: Constant battle between Jin and V. So what was left for him? Second best singer, second best dancer, the one who is always given songs and parts because he knows nothing about producing. It's not that he feels jealous of his members. He wouldn't feel that sort of resentment towards any of them, but he was not blind and he could see why people would like to know more about the other members instead of knowing him. If he was honest, he could understand the meaning behind the tweet that he was currently checking and that was slowly bringing tears to his eyes. Was he really so bad that users sent such mean words to him? Probably so, because what else would motivate those people otherwise.

He brought the sleeve of his sweatshirt to his eye and wiped the single tear that had escaped. He could not afford for his eyes to be watery or for his face to turn red when they were about to have an interview and the final rehearsal for their stage on the AMA's. He took a deep breath and tried to avoid thinking about the mean words he had just read by looking through the loving messages but nothing could erase the insults from his mind.

He stood up and walked towards the bed where his loving boyfriend was soundly asleep. Jimin smiled at the sight. Hoseok looked so peaceful this way, he hoped his hyung was dreaming of him. He laid next to him and cuddled under his protective arms. "You okay Jiminie?" Hoseok mumbled out making Jimin flinch a little. "Oh yes. Sorry didn't mean to wake you up" Jimin replied getting closer to Hobi, who tenderly pulled the blanket that kept him warm to cover both of their bodies. "How much time do we have left?" Hobi asked knowing that they would be picked up soon. "About half an hour" Jimin answered checking the time in his phone. Hoseok growled a little and pulled Jimin even closer, almost like one big plushie, Hobi hid his head in the crook of Jimin's neck and fell asleep again. 

Jimin chuckled upon feeling the tickles caused by Hoseok's breathing landing in his neck. Since their arrival to the US, the schedules have been tremendous. Their career had really sky rocketed since the Billboard Music Awards and as much as he was happy, a part of him wished to get a little more rest or fun. They had not been able to go sightseeing at all this time, specially because now they would totally get recognized if they walked down the LA streets. Not to mention that they had been invited to a whole lot of shows and interviews. Jimin couldn't even count how many times he had introduced himself in the last few days. He could tell that the rest of Bangtan was feeling as tired as he was. Just like when they were preparing for a comeback, there were always periods of time when sleeping and eating became a secondary matter. Not that he was complaining about the latter, though, cause if anything that would help him lose those extra pounds he still had on him. 

Of course, there always was the other side of the matter. They were happy. Really happy. They knew this time they had really made it big. Possibly bigger than what anyone they knew would ever do. The rehearsals they had already made had been widely acclaimed by those who had already seen them. They had also met many amazing people, celebrities and fans that supported them. It was almost unreal. It was also what had brought hate towards them lately and probably the main reason behind the tweets like the one he had just read. Why was it that he could not stop thinking about what he had just read? Jimin really hated the fact that those words could totally affect him. It was quite unbearable. Luckily, he knew someone who could always cheer him up. Trying not to move too much so that Hobi didn't wake up from his slumber, he took his cellphone again and sent a text.

-

Hi. Are you awake?
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
Hi Jiminie.
I am always awake for you. How is
it going in the US?

It's going great. Will you watch
the show tomorrow?
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
Of course! Mnet is going to
broadcast it here.
I seriously can't wait.

But anyway, How is it going with
Hoseok- sunbae? Is he
treating you kindly?

It's going wonderful.
I love him so much. I think I'm in love
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
Thought you loved me :(

Of course I love you.
You know what I mean
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
You do love me, right?

Yes I do!
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
I love you too Jiminie.

You know, I think we have
gained a couple of haters

I read some pretty mean
messages just an hour ago.
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
Success always brings hate, Jiminie. 
Don't pay attention to them.
Enjoy what you are living.

Promise to watch our
stage tomorrow?
✓✓

Jisung- hoobae
I wouldn't miss it!
I gotta go. Love you alright?
Don't be sad. 

I love you too!
Thank you so much!
✓✓

-

Jimin smiled, maybe he should also text his brother and make sure that he watched him on TV as well. If he could not be Bangtan's pride, he could at least be his family's. He was about to write the message when he realized that they didn't have any more time to rest.

He gave Hobi a small kiss on the forehead trying to wake him up because they needed to get ready. "Hobi- hyung" he called pressing his lips against the older's nose. "We gotta leave" he insisted as he stroked Hobi's red hair. "Five more minutes" Hoseok requested making Jimin chuckle. "What if I kiss you for those five more minutes?" Jimin offered tilting his head to fully face Hoseok who was now wide awake. "You've got yourself a deal, darling" Hobi answered instantly lifting his face up and delivering a kiss to Jimin's sweet lips. This would be the five minutes in heaven.

ººº

'AMA's tomorrow at 2pm' Jisung wrote on the notepad that laid next to his computer at work. Of course he would not miss BTS' presentation at the American Music Awards. He wanted to see his sunbaes performing. Specially Jimin, the one who had taken the spot that should've been his. 

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References & People

• No More Dream: BTS' Debut Song. Fourth track of BTS' Debut Album. 2 Cool 4 Skool. Released June 13th, 2013.

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• Oh Sehun: Main dancer, singer, rapper and maknae of EXO. Born April 12th, 1994.

• Choi Minho: Singer, rapper and dancer of SHINee. Born December 9th, 1991.

• Jay Park: South Korean singer, model, dancer, songwriter, model and entrepeneur. Formely a member of 2pm. Born April 25th, 1987m

• Taeyang: Singer and dancer of Big Bang. Currently in military service. Born May 18th, 1988.