The Chaos Within (A Bellatrix Fanfiction)

Apologies

'Morning Ezza.' Draco greeted as I joined the Slytherin table.

'Morning Draco.' I nodded, sitting by Rosanna. 

Our timetable's were already being handed out. I grabbed a piece of toast while I waited for Professor Snape to get to me. This year I'd chosen to carry on with Arithmancy and Ancient Runes, but this year I'd also chosen Care of Magical Creatures too.

'Miss Brooks.' Snape handed me my timetable. I scanned it; looks like I had Transfiguration first, and Arithmancy afterwards. This should be a fun morning then! (Note the strong sarcasm) 

I chatted with the other's and then the morning post owls came. 

I recognised Loki, my mum's handsome tawny owl soaring over, and landed in front of me, nearly knocking my orange juice over. He had a letter tied to his leg.

I sighed. 'Probably my mum asking for the billionth time if I've forgotten anything.' I untied the letter and opened it. 

'That's a nice owl you've got Erin.' Draco commented, grinning as he untied a package from his eagle owl. 

I rolled my eyes. 'He's my mum's.' I carried on reading. Just as I guessed. Mum thought I'd left Shadow at home, because she couldn't remember if she'd seen me bring her. How could I forget my own cat?? I sighed deeply, writing a quick response, that yes, Shadow was here, yes, she was safe, and no, I wouldn't forget my own bloody cat. I sent a quick hi to dad before retying the letter to Loki and he set off again after helping himself to some toast. 

Tyler, who'd been reading over my shoulder, snorted. 'Your mum thought you left your own cat behind?' 

I chuckled. 'Yeah, she can forgetful like that.' 

'Well, I'd give Longbottom a run for his money then.' Draco piped up, grinning. I laughed. 

'Right... we'd better head off to lessons.' Becka said. 

I rolled my eyes at her. 'You're such a nerd, Becks. I'd rather skip transfig.' 

'Yeah, so would I, but McGonagall will have our heads if we don't turn up.' She riposted. 

'Fair enough.' I nodded, before following the group out of the hall. 

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'God, that lesson was so boring!' Suzanne complained as we left class.

'That's only because you didn't manage to fully turn your gerbil into a goblet.' Tristan smirked. 'The goblet was still squeaking.' 

'Shut up.' She growled as the whole group laughed. I didn't join in the conversation though. I was thinking about something that hadn't occurred to me before. In our defence against the dark arts lessons, it was all about defending yourself against dark stuff. 

That was where I stopped at the line. To cross it or to not cross it? What exactly did I want with my life? My mum sent me here so I could have a normal life. But my dad was a follower of you-know-who. Was I also supposed to go down that path? I mean, I agreed with a lot of his and my mum's values, mudbloods and blood traitors shouldn't even be allowed into Hogwart's. But as much as my mum agreed with that stuff, she'd done her best to keep me shielded from any of the nasty parts. I'd only found out the real reason my dad was in Azkaban before I came to Hogwarts because my mum wanted to send me under her maiden name instead, which she'd privately spoken to Professor Dumbledore about, who also knew about my real bloodline too. He hadn't treated me any differently for it though. 

All this thinking was hurting my head. 'Erm, guys, I'll see you later.' I said. 'I... need to go and check on Shadow.' 

I had lied though; as I left the group, I headed outside and sat under a tree near the lake. I just needed time to myself like this sometimes. It felt great to be a part of something here, but deep down, I knew I was set apart from the others because of my dark secret. 

'Erin?' 

I looked up. Lee Jordan had come over. 

'Oh, hi Lee.' I said casually. I still felt bad about how my friends had treated him last night. 

'So, I'm sorry about how Fred and George treated you yesterday. They're my friends, but you're my friend too.'

I shook my head. 'Don't be sorry, it's fine. You can see why they reacted like that; I'm a Slytherin, we have this reputation for being big, bad bitches.' 

He chuckled. 'Well, I guess you just messed up the tradition then.' 

'Yep.' My grin faded. 'Oh, by the way... about last night... I'm sorry my friends spoke to you like that. It was completely out of order.' 

'Hey, don't worry about it.' He assured me. 'It didn't bother me. Besides, Fred and George insulted you first. A friend for a friend, right?' 

I giggled. 'Right.' 

He sat down beside me on the warm, dry grass. 'I didn't break my promise, either.' 

'Which promise?' I raised an eyebrow. 

'That we'd hang out today.' He laughed. 'Even if it was for a short time.' 

'yeah, true.' I agreed wryly. 'Speaking of which, we'd better get walking to class, or we'll be late.'

'Dang it, you're right.' He jumped to his feet, pulling me up with him. 'Shame, I was enjoying this conversation.' 

'Maybe we can continue it later.' I suggested. 

'Yeah, great idea.' He smiled. 'See you later Ezza.' 

'See you later Lee.'