Blue

Chapter 15

December

A week later, I woke up with a big smile on my face. And all throughout the day, my smile stayed. That is, until I had to dress for my dinner date with Shawn.
We hadn't been out in so long, I really wanted to look nice for him, but I haven't really worn much other than leggings, oversize tee shirts, and maxi dresses for the past few months. I was able to find a nice, white cashmere sweater and some knee high black boots to go with my black leggings. I decorated my outfit a little more with some sliver bracelets, earrings, and a simple necklace with a snowflake charm, just to be a little festive.
Before getting ready for our date, I had to pick up his gift. After Shawn agreed to let me take him out for his birthday, I made a call. I knew I wanted him to come home, but I didn't want that to be his only gift. I know he really wants to know whether the baby is a boy or a girl, and I really appreciated that he respected my decision to not find out. But now, I'm starting to feel anxious. I want to know too, but I don't want to find out alone.

So, I called Gwen to ask her to write the baby's gender down and put it in an envelope. Then, I placed an order to Shawn's favorite cupcake shop, and I asked them to make a gender reveal cupcake for him. I know he won't expect it, and I'm really hoping he likes his gift. I also planned on giving him back his house key, which I'm sure he's expecting.
Six o'clock, the doorbell rang. I made reservations to our favorite restaurant for six thirty, and Shawn was right on time with picking me up. I made sure to fix my hair up before going to the door. When I saw him on the other side, I smiled.
"Wow..." his eyes drifted down my body and then up again. "You look beautiful."
"Thank you. It was the nicest thing I have that still fits." I opened he door wider. "Do you want to get a drink or something before we go?"
He shook his head. "No, I'm okay. I don't want to miss our reservations."
I turned back towards the couch to grab my purse and laughed at what he'd said. "We won't miss our reservations. I don't move that slow."

While he drove us to the restaurant, we talked about everything and nothing at all. We talked more in that fifteen minute drive than over the last five years of our marriage, it seemed. And as we spoke to each other, Shawn held my hand in his and he gently and absentminded stroked my fingers. He made me laugh every couple minutes. I laughed so much I had to pee as soon as we got to the restaurant.
We sat at a table for two, but instead of sitting across from me, he sat on the side next to me. The conversation between the two of us flowed so naturally that anyone onlooking probably wouldn't think that we've been separated for three months.

"I think I might get some dessert..." he said to himself after we'd finished eating.
I thought about the cupcake I had for him at home, so I stopped him. "Don't get anything, I have dessert for you at home."
"Oh, really?" He smirked and his eyes twinkled.
Realizing what I said and how it sounded, I blushed and covered my cheeks. "That's not what I meant!" I laughed. "I bout you a dessert already." I corrected.
He chuckled and closed the menu. "If you say so."

I was about to give him his first gift, but I felt the baby move.
"What's so funny?" Shawn asked with a smile.
"I think I ate too fast." I reached for his hand and moved it onto my belly.
"Is that..." he smiled wider. "Are those hiccups?"
I nodded. "Yeah."
"I had no idea babies can have hiccups before they're born."
I smiled. "She does way more than that. I swear, she dances in there." When I looked up at his face, I expected to see him smiling too. Instead, he seemed more melancholy. "Baby, what's wrong?"
"I just wish I'd been there more to see everything with you, you know?"
I took his hand in mine. "Shawn, us separating was a mutual decision. We had to do it, it was the best thing for us. I'm not upset with you."

"I know, but..." he took a breath before explaining. "I wasn't there to see Cory develop before he was born, for obvious reasons. But I always thought I'd get that chance again when we had a baby. And, instead, I let our marriage get to the point where we were unable to be with each other at a time when we both should be there."
I sighed. "You weren't the only one responsible for our marital issues."
"But, the point is that now, I'm never going to get that chance. I know you want to get your tubes tied, and I could never ask you to not go through with that for my own selfish reasons, but I do have to admit that I.." he sighed softly. "I'm always gonna regret missing out on these moments. With both of my kids."

"You know, I actually thought about that a lot over the past couple months." He looked at me, giving me his full attention. "I mean this in the least offensive way possible, but...once all the stress was gone, I really loved being pregnant." He laughed. So did I. "I mean, honestly, this is probably the happiest I've ever been in my life. And I think I'd want to do it again."
"Really?" He asked.
I smiled and shrugged. "I'm gonna leave it up to God. I don't want to purposefully try, but I don't want to prevent it either."
"Well, when it happens again-"
"If it happens."
"When," he stressed again. I smiled and rolled my eyes. "I'm gonna be there through everything. No matter what."
My smile widened. "Okay."

When the bill came, I picked up the tab, since it's his birthday and I'm treating him. Before we stood, I pulled out the small black box from my purse. "Before I forget," I handed it to him. "Happy birthday."
He took the box from me and gently shook it. "Hm, I wonder what it is."
"Stop playing and open it." I laughed.
He laughed when he opened it to find his house key inside. "Thank you,  baby."
I leaned towards him and pecked his lips. "Even if we don't have another baby, you still get one month to enjoy this time before this one comes."
He smiled and returned my kiss.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"I have one more gift for you." She said to me once we got home. It felt good to finally be home with her. I can't believe how much I've missed her over these past three months, even though we spoke almost daily.
"Oh, right...my dessert." I smiled.
She gave me a half scolding half teasing look. "Yes. Dessert." She said as she pushed a cupcake box towards me.
I smiled. She knew they were my favorite cupcakes. "Ooh, what flavor did you get me?"
"It's chocolate, but..." she smiled. "It's a gender reveal cupcake."
I looked up at her. "Bey, I appreciate this, but if you still don't want to know, we don't have to find out right now. We can wait, if you want."
She smiled so genuine and wide. "I want to know. I've been calling her my little girl for months now, and I feel it, but I really want to know."
I smiled. "You sure?"
"Yes." She nodded.
"Positive?"
She laughed. "Yes! Eat the cake, dammit!"

"Alright." I bit into the cupcake slowly, just to get on her nerve a little bit. I was anxious to see what color it would be too. I bit off almost half of it in one bite, and when I pulled the cupcake back, I saw pink icing in the middle.
I smiled and felt myself tearing a little. "You were right. It's a girl."
She covered her mouth and stood closer to me to see the pink of the cupcake. "Oh, my god!" She covered her face completely and then started crying. "She's a girl. She's my baby Blue."
"I hope those are happy tears." I said as I held her in my arms.
"Of course!" She continued crying for a solid five minutes, and when she finished, she wanted some of the cupcake too.
"Wait a minute, it's my birthday, and this is my dessert." I teased her.
"Do you want another dessert?" She raised her brow. That time, there was definitely no mistaking what she meant.

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AN: sorry it's short, sorry if there are spelling mistakes. Hope you enjoy.