[Joey x Chandler] COMPILATION OF SHORT STORIES FROM AO3

Practice

■●□○AUTHOR: ANASTASIATREMAINE○□●■

Summary:

Sometimes the only thing scarier than not getting what you want is getting it.

Notes:

I'm watching Friends for the very first time and I find myself really invested in Chandler Bing as a character and I love his relationship with Joey. I'm only up to Season 3 so I don't know what happens later, but I have some peripheral knowledge about Chandler's dad and whatnot. This fic takes place specifically during 2.24 "The One with Barry and Mindy's Wedding", when Joey has to kiss a guy for an audition, and like I said I haven't finished the series so I'm sorry if it's out of character or if I'm contradicting canon too much, but I think it's pretty consistent with at least their Season 1-3 characterizations. Please review!
In this fic Chandler is a repressed bisexual with a preference for men. Just fyi.
Edited on 1/29 (fixed typos, added a few lines.)

Work Text:

From the second Joey mentions having to kiss a man for an audition, Chandler's heart starts racing. He immediately hates himself for it and pretends he doesn't notice. And then takes a second to berate himself again, for trying to hide something he's doing from his own damn self, because of course that's the kind of thing Chandler does. He hears himself crack a joke, which he always does when he's trying to hide something or diffuse a situation or maybe just cause a distraction. He hears the snorts and sees the eyerolls but it works, he's safe, no one pays him any attention.

Chandler watches Phoebe kiss Joey with a smile on his face, or at least that's what he tells himself he's watching. He's not watching Joey kiss her. He's not watching Joey's mouth. No, he's watching Phoebe, and he does it with an easy slightly amused smile, maybe even a laugh, that alerts no one to the prick of jealousy he's feeling. How Phoebe can just kiss him there in the middle of the coffee shop and no one cares. It's a good kiss, too, he can tell, and Phoebe says as much a moment later.

"Joey, you know, maybe you're just not used to kissing men," Monica is saying, "maybe you just tensed up a little bit."

Joey's eyebrows rise at that, and that open, adorable expression of hope appears on his face as he looks quickly between Chandler and Ross. Chandler definitely doesn't feel his already not-racing heart not-race any faster.

"Over my dead body," Ross says as the girls giggle. Joey turns to Chandler, eyes wide, shrugging a 'come on, why not?'. Chandler pretends he hasn't wanted to kiss Joey, hasn't wanted Joey to want to kiss him, and again fails to fool himself.

He can hear the joke on his lips - 'And I'll be using his dead body as a shield' - but it dies when he meets Joey's eyes.

Chandler affects a long-suffering sigh, perhaps a touch too theatrical in its resignedness, but it makes the girls giggle again as they see he's acquiescing. Ross' shocked expression of 'what the fuck?' almost makes him change his mind, because that feeling of causing disgust and confusion to his friends, or to anyone, is such an enormous cause of fear to him- but again, the impulse fades when he sees Joey's expression. It changes at lightning speed to one of glee and gratitude when he realizes Chandler is agreeing.

"Hands above the waist, alright mister?" Chandler jokes with that touch of smarminess he's perfected as he gets to his feet. Joey laughs and the sound blooms over Chandler like the warmth of the sun.

He knows it's his neuroses and his paranoia, but he feels like the café, the city, the whole world, goes quiet, like a million pairs of eyes are on him, searching him. He coughs awkwardly, seeing that there's nothing on Joey's face now, just a neutral concentration. Chandler knows he views this as nothing but a blip in his acting prep. He pretends it doesn't hurt.