[Joey x Chandler] COMPILATION OF SHORT STORIES FROM AO3

The One With the Ground Rules

He'd set ground rules with Joey, for a laugh, back in Central Perk.

Once they'd followed Chloe into the club later that night, Chandler had stopped laughing.

Chloe was – well, all the usual adjectives he'd use for a crush, and all the adjectives Joey would use, too. Charismatic (him), really, really hot (Joey), and a veritable slew of other things. But mostly those. Actually, Joey had it right. Chloe was hot. The kind of hot that maybe he'd want to bring back to his apartment and have a really, uh, charismatic night with.

Under regular circumstances, he would have already moved to the dance floor, several drinks in, halfway to the night he'd been thinking about since he'd first met Chloe, though of course he'd referred to her as "the hot Xerox girl with the bellybutton ring" for quite some time, damn his awkwardness and inability to make full sentences around women.

But this wasn't really regular circumstances, was it? She didn't just want him, she wanted him and Joey. Both of them. Um. Not for a regular date – he had a feeling that Chloe was just the kind of girl that wanted to try everything once. God, was it hot in there? Or really cold? That night club had temperature issues for sure.

Wait, what had she just said?

"Oh, it's dinosaur guy!" Chloe exclaimed with glee, hopping out of her chair and parting the dancing crowds with nothing more than a flick of her hand, dragging a very familiar (and currently unwelcome) figure with her.

"Hi," Ross said mournfully.

"Chandler, Joey, this is Ross," Chloe smiled, as they shook hands for her sake. "Ross, the guys."

"Nice to meet you," Ross said, tone not changing. "Hey, is there a phone in here?"

Chloe looked startled at the abrupt change of conversation, but recovered quickly, running her hand up and down Ross' arm. "Of course, I'll just, uh, show you where you can get a quarter, then. Be right back."

They watched her go with avid interest, but once she was out of earshot, Chandler turned to Joey.

"Did my eyes just deceive me, or has Ross just accidentally become Mr. Steal Your Girl?" he hissed urgently.

"Wha'?" Joey's attention was still on Chloe.

Chandler snapped his fingers. "Joey. Listen. If she stays with him, our plans for tonight go right out the window, land on the street, and get run over by a cab."

"What plans?" Joey said, and realized. "Oh. You mean – you weren't joking? About-" he gestured frantically between them, and then Chloe, almost smacking Chandler in the face in the process. "Whoops. Sorry. But that – were you serious?"

Sitting back, Chandler looked deflated. "Um. Yeah. No. I was kidding. Of course." He waved down the bartender, and contemplated getting a cigarette. This was embarrassing.

Joey looked thoughtful, which was really starting to unnerve Chandler. It's not like he saw that expression a lot. He stumbled his way through ordering another round of drinks for them and Chloe, the latter just in case she came back.

A moment passed, and the bartender brought their drinks. Chloe was still nowhere near them, having moved over to the other side of the bar with Ross.

This time, it was Joey who spoke first.

"Chandler! She is totally hitting on Ross!"

"What? How do you know that?"

Joey motioned to himself. "You think I don't know when a girl is hitting on someone? C'mon, Chandler, me?"