I Promise This Isn't A Cult

B-Bomb's Ultimate Birthday Wish.

B-Bomb: I'm about to fight my members.

Red Minhyuk: What's new?

Min-Woof: I'll back you up. (ง •̀_•́)ง

Pretty Senpai: Please, you couldn't even hurt a fly.

Rocky: I dunno flies are pretty killable.

Drummer Boi: My cat likes to chase flies.

Gentleman Prince: What a bunch of murders.

Min-Woof: Like you're any better. ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭

Gentleman Prince: I'll have you know I've never killed a fly... I make Kiho do it.

B-Bomb: Sorry to interrupt your fly murdering but I think Jaehyo just died. Rip.

Min-Woof: Lmao what happened? ヾ(｡･ω･)ｼ

Rocky: Is he okay?

B-Bomb: He's fine, just tripped down the last 2 steps to his car. I think he's given up on life.

Gentleman Prince: Honestly same.

Drummer Boi: He's my spirit animal.

Pretty Senpai: It's too cold to be giving up on life outside. His dick will probably shrivel up and fall off if he stays on the ground any longer.

Red Minhyuk: That's why I keep a walrus in my pants. Keeps the boys nice a toasty.

Min-Woof: Hyung What the actual fuck!

Rocky: Are you sure you only use it to keep the boys warm?

Red Minhyuk: I dunno know Rocky-ah, do you wanna get smacked.

Drummer Boi: But he's only child!

Rocky: Say that to my black belt.

Gentleman Prince: Oh shit Rocky is going to kick some ass.

Pretty Senpai: How many views do you think we can get on youtube if we upload the fight.

Drummer Boi: Probably a lot but we shouldn't.

Min-Woof: They can fight after the real party. BBomb hyung get your ass over here. (⁎˃ᆺ˂)

B-Bomb: Sorry I had to drag Jaehyo into a taxi.

B-Bomb: Also What 'real party'? I told you not to?

Pretty Senpai: Yeah and that was selfish.

B-Bomb: How was that selfish?
Red Minhyuk: Birthdays are the only time we can eat tons of cake and not feel bad about it.

Rocky: We can't celebrate someone's birthday if they're not here.

Min-Woof: exactly, so hurry your ass up. (；￣Д￣）

Gentleman Prince: Also we have a nice surprise for you.

Drummer Boi: It's what you always wished for.

B-Bomb: Let me just make sure Jiho isn't dying in the bathroom then I'll head over.

B-Bomb: Why are all my members so heavy. I'm about to leave his ass in the hallway.

Red Minhyuk: But you won't.

Min-Woof: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Gentleman Prince: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°)

Pretty Senpai: ( ͡⚆ ͜ʖ ͡⚆)

Drummer Boi: ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

Rocky: ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )ᕗ

B-Bomb: I changed my mind I'm going to bed. G'nite

Min-Woof: YOU CAN'TTTTTTT ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚

Rocky: We worked really hard on your surprise, you have to see it.

B-Bomb: Yeah, yeah. I'm already in my car, be there in like 15 minutes.

Everyone sat around the empty park tables doing their own thing. Rocky was calmly watching Minhyuk (Mx) deface the public property with a washable marker. He believed Minhyuk's new hidden talent was drawing dickbutt but that probably wouldn't be aired on any broadcast. "Do you really have a walrus in your pants?" Minhyuk (M6) asked out loud. Everyone turned to look at Minhyuk (BtoB), it must have been a joke, no one would keep something like that in their pants just to keep their dick warm.

Minhyuk (BtoB) reached into his pants and quickly pulled something out, slapping Minhyuk (M6) in the face with it. There in his hand was a walrus beanie baby. It was silent, no one knew what to believe. Was this real life? Then hysteria broke loose. B-Bomb walked up to them confused, until he saw the Walrus being swung around. He sighed before taking the poor beanie baby and shoving it back into Minhyuk's pants.

"I can't breathe." Minhyuk (Mx) wheezed out as tears pricked the corners of his eyes.

"You seem calm about this." Rocky quitely stated at the older man.

"He's been doing this for years, I'm used to it." B-Bomb shrugged as he answered. He personally didn't mind the cold but to each their own. "So what's the surprise? It better be worth this cold weather." Minhyuk (CNB) quickly grabbed B-Bomb's arm and tugged him towards the direction of the surprise. B-Bomb's mouth dropped open when he saw the large bouncy castle. "You guys really got me a bouncy castle? You do know I was joking right?"

"Of course, that's why we rented you a bouncy castle. Hurry up and get inside." Minhyun lightly shoved the birthday boy towards the plastic castle. B-Bomb wasted no time entering the brightly colored contraption and gave an experimental bounce. It was just like a trampoline but something about it made the castle so much more fun. Everyone snickered at him while Minhyuk (CNB) recorded for future blackmail. Getting tired of watching the others joined B-Bomb inside the bouncy castle. They played all the childish games and performed amazing acrobatic stunts. All in all it was a great way to end the day. Once everyone was covered in a thin layer of sweat and satisfied, Minhyun brought the cake out with lit candles as everyone sang happy birthday. B-Bomb made a wish, dodged Minhyuk (Mx) from smashing his face into the cake and gave Minhyuk (Btob) a sloppy kiss on the cheek for he was the one who rented the bouncy castle. The cake was cut into pieces while they watched the glorious castle deflate. The sad limp pile was plastic was picked up by the company workers and whisked away out of sight. The whole cake was unsurprisingly eaten and soft hugs were exchanged. Rocky walked into the dorm, making a beeline to the bathroom.

"Did you go to the gym or something?" Moonbin asked as he passed Rocky in the hallway.

"Something like that, it was definitely a workout." Rocky smiled.

"Well don't tire yourself out too much we have practice tomorrow." Moonbin said with a concerned tone.

"I didn't hyung." Rocky entered the bathroom and waved at Moonbin before closing the door.

Today was a good day.

(A/N):Okay so I feel like I have to explain the walrus thing. That isn't something I made up but is based off 'fond' memories from my middle school days, 7th grade to be exact. I had a dude friend who would keep a walrus beanie baby in his pants (between his jeans and boxers not actually touching his you know.) during the winter because it was cold outside. There had been multiple times where he said he had a walrus in his pants but no one believed him or thought he was telling a dick joke. One day during English class he whipped it out and smacked a kid he was debating with with the walrus. Everyone lost their shit and it was honestly the most funniest thing that happened during my whole middle school experience.