How You Should Love (Completed)

Epilogue: Amore Eterno (Final)

(Please watch the video made by my good friend  dedicated for this book ❤)

credits: @ seju-ah

[Soundtrack: Evanescence-My Immortal]   

/previously/
 
             
"Dear My Love, Chaeyoung

     I honestly don't know how to begin. I am not so good in words and I don't know if I could say it all in here.

     I am a terrible person Chaeyoung.I am a terrible mother and I am a terrible wife to you.I looked back at everything that I did wrong and I couldn't even be more sorry.I could just look back with full of regrets.Half of your life you are always there to love me the day you said "I do and for better or for worse".You always kept that promise for me.You always did.You never failed in showing to me how much you loved me.On the other hand Im just an utter disappointment.

     The day that I met you my life had become  totally different in so many ways I couldn't ever imagine.You had love me too deeply that despite all of the wounds that I bore you your heart still choses to love me.If I could turn back time  I would chose not to meet you so in that way I could have avoided all the costs of hurting you.I would have avoided hurting your precious and kind heart.The kindest heart I've ever seen in my entire life.Our lives will be totally different and apart but in that way there is an assurance that I wouldn't have hurt you.We will never be like this.We will never be this hurt.But to be honest I couldn't imagine  a life without you at all.Even though sometimes I wished we never met I still wished that we are.

   Sometimes I thought I've gone far too stupid on my own because I kept on making stupid decisions in my life out of pride and my selfishness.At some point I had become a totally different person who doesn't deserved your forgiveness.Sometimes I asked myself why I did it and said to myself that maybe I never really treasured your love for me that I easily took it for granted just like that. I easily jumped on Jin's arms when I thought we all have everything wrong.I had been blinded by my foolish desires.I am always chasing happiness in all the wrong directions, only to find out that you are the right one all along.You are my happiness.

    If I knew we would never seen each other again after that day I would have never let go of your hand if I had just cried and told you that "I love you and stay with me".Would you still be here smiling beside me? Im missing you now.There's so much I want you to hear and I miss you.I miss you so much that sometimes its hard for me to breathe.Tears flow on my pillow every night with all the haunting memory of you that I always hold on to.Im missing you holding me close.I'll always be thinking of you even if our destinies won't change, I have something to tell you "I want to go back..." to that day to that time, this one wish is all I need.

    You are the one wish that I kept wishing on the stars.Im sorry for never being good enough for you.I wish you knew how I missed you so and how I regret and was sorry for everything wrong that I did.

         I love you not knowing how,where and why.I love you so simply that my heart is forever where you are.I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you.So intimate and loving because there is just an us.I hope there's still a chance for us.I hope this isn't goodbye.

   
I love you wherever I go.I will always love you.

                                    Sincerely,