Harry: Hiya Snapple!
Snape: A hiya, a Hazza Pottah *Prances around potions classroom*
Harry: Ooo! Look at your belly! Its going Ba-Boing!
Snape: *Gasps dramatically and grabs his stomach wiggling it around* Boing Boing Boing!
Hermione, Ron, Ginny, and Draco: *Enter classroom. Stare. Slowly back out and peek through door*
Harry: Hey Snapple! Want a froggie?
Snape: A no! A frogga willa poy-son, a me!
Harry: Too bad Snapple! *Tackles Snape*
Snape: What the devil? *Falls to the floor and stops moving*
Harry: *Gasps and jumps up* I've killed Snapple. Oh no! I have to hide his body
Snape: *Snores*
Harry: HIS CORPSE IS MAKING NOISE! OO! OO! OO! I know. I'll find Mione. She's good at hiding things. She hid her diary very well, too bad I found it
Snape: I waanaa reada *Jumps up*
Harry: Okay Mr Snapples corpse, but I will have to hide your body in dirt later
Snape: *Nods enthusiastically*
Harry: *Pulls out small book*
Hermione: *Tried to open the door*
Ron and Draco: *Restrain her*
Ginny: Are you crazy? Its too dangerous to go near a whacko Harry, but add Snape to the mix and you'll die!
Hermione: If he reads that I will slap him until he lands on mars
Harry: *Clears throat. In a squeaky girly voice* I swear I will kill Harry!
Hermione: Plug your ears!
Ginny, Ron, and Draco: *Smirk*
Snape: *Braids hair while listening*
Harry: *In high pitched voice* Today he was screaming that dammed song again. The one about me and that ferret supposedly 'in love, then marriage'. I will hurt him! I have no idea how he even found out I liked him, but rest assured I will murder whoever told him very, very slowly.
Draco: *Smirks like Sirius Black is gay* Well Granger?
Snape: *In gossipy voice* Oh! My! Devil! Her-mione Gran-gerrrr likes the Draco Mal-foy? That is newwws!
Harry: I know! Finally someone understands. Now continuing on. It gets better. *In girly voice* They will die. I absolutely hate Harry! Every single person in this school is now asking me 'So when did you fall in love?' And 'is he a good kisser' and my personal favorite, note sarcasm, 'When do you plan on getting married?' I hate Harry! He had no right to spread rumors about me and Malfoy, no matter how much I want them to be true.
Snape: *Squeals* The devil! That was such juicy gossip!
Harry: It was. But now I must hide your corpse, so go die again
Snape: *Nods and falls backwards*
Harry: Bye Bye Snapple! *Holds knife up and slams it down*
Ron: *Catches his wrist*
Harry: *Turns slowly to Ron* Ronnie-farts.... You stopped my ridding if Mr Snapples corpse? DIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! *Chases after Ron waving knife like a pyschopath*
Snape: *Prances out of the room* What the devil just happened?
Hermione: At least they forgot about the diary thing
Draco: Oh no they didn't
Ginny: I got a plan *Runs to recruit Harry*
.
Should I put Ginny's scheme involving Harry as a chapter?
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High Harry
FanfictionHow would the infamous Harry Potter behave if he was high? What if the horcrux was 99.9% of his brain? This book is a collection of stupid and ridickulus things Harry Potter might do if he was completely stupid, which he sorta is since Hermione had...
