Double life

Chapter 13

© axellesmet 2014

All rights including those in copyright in the content of this story are owned by axellesmet. It's illegal to steal and/or copy.

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JUSTIN ON THE SIDE

Unedited !!

Chapter 13

It's getting bad again.

That's the conclusion of a whole week of sleepless nights and avoiding Connor. The fact that no matter how hard I try, I can't sleep or the fact that if I try to eat something more than a piece of fruit a day, it comes back out, worries me. I knew at some point things would go bad again. I knew that the attacks would come.

I didn't know it would come so fast though. I didn't know that I would have no one to pick me up again. The person who would pick me up, is gone.

He left.

And I'm left alone, vulnerable.

And I utterly despise it.

The only persons in my life whom I could talk to, left. Now I have no one. No one to pick me up if I fall again. And I can't stop myself from falling. It's stronger than my will.

I may seem strong, but I'm not. I'm a weakling.

I guess this is life and I have to get through no matter how shìtty it gets. The thing is ... I don't say I need easy, I just need possible. And right now I'm in a situation where it can't get better, it doesn't matter what I choose, it will backfire on me.

With still no decision on what to do I got out of bed and into my jogging clothes. It's 6 am and I have two hours to go to school. So one to go joggi- running. Besides fighting and racing, that's the only thing that keeps me sane, together with a few other things. And Jake of course. I would've called him over but he doesn't know. Gabe's the only one.

And now Connor.

But I can't call either of them because Connor caused the problem and Gabe... He already got a lot of things to think about and I don't want to give him even more. So that leaves me, my mind and a creepy loner path I'm running through.

I don't think I've ever been here before? It's like a wide field but everything is arid and looks dead. Thinking about all the problems that need to be solved probably made me take a wrong turn. Kind of freaks me out...

Breathe

"I'm not afraid."

"I'm not afraid."

"I'm not weak."

He taught me this. How to not be afraid, to get rid of those nasty demons who keep haunting my dreams. When he was still around, it was much easier and it actually worked. Now it only brings sad memories up. It makes me vulnerable.

Something I don't want to be .. Ever again.

When I looked around I couldn't see anything but my creepy environment. I heard from Justin that Riley had been hiding in the fields ... I really hope he doesn't mean these ones because that would not be very ... positive.

It is strange though ... Normally there wouldn't go a week by when Riley didn't do anything to work me up. He picked a lot of fights with me and my gang. Though it's only his pride that suffers under it.

2 weeks.

That's the amount of time he's left me alone ... I could bet my money on it that he is planning something big. And dangerous for that matter.

If I would make a rough guess, I'd say that he's furious that he's lost so many times to me. He's absolutely pinned on having me in his gang and I think that whatever he has planned ... It'll be big.