𝕥𝕠𝕠 𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕖 • 𝕞.𝕔

chapter 39

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   I opened my eyes, feeling dizzy. I was still in this uncomfortable position, and I was feeling so heavy, I shut my eyes back. The medicine didn't have much effect on me anymore, and my whole body was hurting so badly. Especially my head and my stomach. I could hear voices, and when I tried to move my arm, there was a needle in there. I moaned in disgust and discontentment and just groaned to myself, trying to adjust my position. I couldn't. I was sweating so much, and I felt like I had been sleeping for many, many, many hours.

But it probably had been just a few minutes. No one was by my side, Ashton had vanished. I was hoping that he was still there, I didn't want to be alone.

"You don't seem to realise, mate," I could finally hear his voice. I didn't have the strength to open my eyes, so tried to hear better.

"Will you let me in the God damn room?"

   I froze as I heard that last voice. I tried to speak, but instead, a whimper came out. Michael was there, coming home from nowhere. I wanted to hear him, but at the same time, I was still furious. But in the state I was in right now, I didn't quite think about it.

"She told me about that fight you guys had when we were packing her bags. At nine months into the pregnancy? Really, Michael?"

"Thanks for taking care of her, now my baby is almost there, so I would like to see her."

"I don't think she wants to see you."

"Seriously, Ash?"

"She's having a hard enough time without you stepping in!"

"Fuck off, Ashton, let me in, you absolute dick!"

   I heard the door opening in a quick manner, and I just looked at him. He was wearing this old plaid shirt, black skinny jeans and his hair was messy. Messier than the usual. As soon as he saw me, he walked quickly towards me. He sat nearby, and held my hand. I didn't budge, and just smiled.

"I'm sorry," he just whispered.

"Why didn't you pick up your phone?"

"I was asleep, I am so sorry."

I didn't answer, and just closed my eyes. "I'm so mad at you."

"I don't hate you, I'm sorry, I got carried away. I love you."

"Okay."

   I could feel his grip on my hand tightening. I heard somebody else coming in, and I opened my eyes to see who it was. Thankfully, it was my doctor, finally. I had never been more relieved to see him, ever. I took a deep breath, and smiled.

"Hello Lee, hello Michael, how are you guys?"

"I could be better," I just spoke. "You said that on the scale from one to ten, I would see how much it hurts. It's an eleven."

   He just chuckled, and started inspecting me. I felt better from the moment I knew he was here, and to know that finally, I would finally be having my baby in just a matter of hours. He told me that I would now be ready to go into the delivery room, and from this moment, my whole world started spinning. It was happening. I couldn't see anything around me, I was just feeling as if I was in a big tunnel of light, for hours, but I knew it was only lasting for a few seconds.

   Once we were in there, I just stared at Michael, holding his hand, tighter than ever. It was hurting in my whole body, and they hadn't done anything yet. He was looking at me, and he leaned in to kiss me on the forehead. I didn't move.

"I fucking hate you, Clifford."

"I love you, too."

   It took a few minutes before they did the epidural on me. I was afraid of what Michael would think of me, sweaty, gross, crying, and screaming with every bit of energy that was left in my body. But after a while, my muscles seemed to relax, and my mind didn't react as I had expected it to. Instead of being angry, yelling, I started sobbing. I had shed so many tears today, and the final ones were now streaming down my face. I took deep breaths, it was hard, but as I heard the sound of a baby crying, I just broke down completely.

   The baby was there. I didn't know whether this was a boy or a girl yet; I just threw my head back, and when I looked by my side, Michael wasn't here anymore. The doctor walked towards me with the baby in his arms.

   I muffled a laugh as I replayed the moment in my mind. One second Michael was at my side, allowing me to tightly grip his hand. I had nearly made it, the baby was almost out. The doctor shouted about seeing a head and next thing I knew, Michael had yelped and left the room.

"Here you go," he said, placing the baby in my arms. I saw Michael coming back, wiping tears away from his face. I couldn't believe I was seeing him like that. He leaned in, looking at the baby's face, smiling brightly.

I couldn't speak, and just stared down at my child in amazement, my whole body in shock mode.

"Boy or girl?" he then asked, voice cracking.

"Girl," Doctor Stone announced.

"Oh, my God," I cried. "Oh, my God."

"You did such a good job," Michael said, holding me. "You did it. She's here."

I kept on crying, and Michael kept on kissing me, and I couldn't believe anything that was happening. I looked down at my daughter, and I saw the most beautiful thing. She wasn't a mistake. She never was.

"I know, right," Michael replied, running his fingers through my hair. "That's Jasey. Baby Jasey."

"She does look like a Jasey," I just nodded, and sobbed a bit harder. "Damn it."

"Jasey Belle."

"Jasey Belle," I acknowledged. "Jasey Belle Clifford, that doesn't sound too bad."

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