All Night || d.t

Dad

*Ethan's POV*

»You always loved him more and gave him more appreciation because you knew that your older son wouldn't be shit or worth anything!« I say. That's the truth and she can't hide that.

It makes me so angry. It's a wonder that I'm still so calm especially after all the things that happened tonight.

Obviously I do have a heart and I'm patient because otherwise things would be very different right now.

She just looks at me and her eyes start to sparkle. Although she looks angry I know she's about to cry but she can't get me with this. I'm not as weak as she is. I don't care about that.

»You say he saved himself? I should save myself too and disappear.« I say and walk towards the bathroom so I can finally wash all this blood off my face. I can hear how she sits back down and sighs..

»You're exactly like your dad.. always leaving me.« she says annoyed and disappointed. I freeze. That's it. I clench my fists and my blood starts boiling.

She didn't say this.. she didn't say this.. she can't say this.. she can't do this to me.. she did and she doesn't care.. does she think she said something normal?

Does she know what this means to me? Does she know how much she actually destroys me with this?

This woman is making me sick.

How can I call her mom? I'm not like my dad and I never will be. She's not going to ruin me. I won't let her do this.

I forget about washing my face and calming down and rush towards the door before taking a look at her or saying another word. I'm sure that I'll hurt her really really bad if I stay another second and open my mouth.

I get right into my car. Damn I've never been so angry at her or anybody else. The fact that I'm also hurt makes me even angrier. I hate this so much. This shouldn't hurt me. I'm not a pussy.

I'm noting going to cry. I'm not a child anymore. I died when I was ten and I'm not going back to these days. I would rather to drown myself than to cry.

*Your POV*

No matter how hard I try to concentrate all I can think about is him and I would wonder if there would be a night in which I'm not thinking about him.

Although he hurt me today the words he said and the things that happened today won't leave my head.. he would handcuff me on him.. I'm not allowed to leave his side ever again. I know why and in which way he said it but it still makes me whimper.

When I think about how angry he's been and how he fought that guy because he touched me, this feeling gets worse.

He looks so hot when he gets angry and starts breathing faster... or when he furrows his eyebrows and looks at me like he's going to kill me.. or when he screams with a deep voice.. I would love to let him destroy me.

These things should scare me or make me feel uncomfortable or anything else instead of making me wet but I can't help it. It's not on my hand to be honest. It's his fault.

I know these thoughts are wrong and I need to lose them because if I get too attached to him it'll be my end and he'll really destroy me. There's no bright future for any of us. He would break my heart while I'm one of the other bitches who fall for him.

I can't let this happen to myself although I already lost because I want him more than anything in moment like these. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. After he left I took a quick shower and put some comfortable clothes on and decided to calm down..