The Irish Bachelor Jacksepticeye X Reader Bachelor! AU

17

You couldn't breathe. You were sitting on a closed toilet seat in a stall in the hospital bathroom, you were hugging your knees, your heart was snapped in two, you couldn't stop crying, and you couldn't breathe.

You realize you're hyperventilating when you start to get light headed. You have to calm down. Why can't you just calm down?!

You try to remember what Lily said to do, and cup shaking hands over your mouth. You try to ignore all the other things you remember about Lily, and focus on breathing.

In about 3 minutes, you're calmer, but you're still sniffling.

It's then you hear the door to the bathroom open, and someone else walk in.

You hold your breath, trying to see who it is by their shoes.

"[Y|n]? Are you in here?" a quiet voice breaks through the silence, and you see a pair of pale blue flats.

Luna.

You take a shaking breath, and see the shoes stop. She turns towards your stall, and she knocks on it gently.

"[Y|n], is this you?"

You sigh, and your "yes" sounds more like a croak because of your tears.

"Ok. You don't have to leave the stall if you don't want to, but do you want to talk?"

You don't know what it is. Maybe it's the fact that you don't have to show your face. Maybe it's how kind and gentle Luna sounds. Maybe you're just sick and tired of secrets.

Regardless of the reason, the dam holding your emotions in breaks. You open your mouth and after a deep shuddering breath, start telling Luna everything.

You tell her about how you've known Jack, or at least about him, since 2012 when he started YouTube. You tell her how excited you had been to meet him. You tell her that when you actually did meet him, he exceeded expectations. You tell her even though it's only been a few dates, you'd felt like you were falling. You had felt so special, and wanted, and important.

When you tell what you had found out, you hear her gasp.

"I-I feel so betrayed. I don't know what I'm going to do."

You see the door of the stall push forward, kept closed by the hinges, and you realize Luna has either rested her hand or her forehead gently on it.

"I think..." Her voice is angrier than you have ever heard it. "I think you should leave. Jack... He doesn't deserve you. He doesn't deserve to talk to you, or hear you, he doesn't even deserve the luxury of looking at you. I think you should leave."

Her conviction gives you pause as you think on her words. You definitely don't want to date Jack anymore, but what about the friends you'd made? You would miss everyone.

Before you can answer, the bathroom door opens and you hear numerous pairs of feet shuffling in. Luna's weight leaves the door, and you watch her ballet flats turn to a pair of combat boots.

There's a tense silence before the ballet flats move out of the way, and the combat boots replace them.

"Hey, [Y|n]," Roman's voice is the next voice you hear. The combat boots scuff the tile floor as if they don't know what to do next. "I, uh, I called Chris and talked to the producers. We wanted you to know that... If you decide to leave..." She sighs, as if afraid to reveal too much.

You realize there are probably microphones recording the conversation. For some reason, you're not too bothered. You're done caring about what others are gonna say about you. You are the victim. They're gonna be on your side, and if they aren't, then you shouldn't care about their opinions anyway.