In My Life

Chapter 40:

January 05, 1962

There was no sound in the luxurious suite of the Stafford Hotel in London, yet everyone was moving, more like pacing around and not talking. Larry paced back and forth by the east window, tapping a pencil onto his notepad, trying to process everything. Millie was on hold with Vogue magazine in Australia, trying to get Olivia's photo shoot rescheduled. Olivia sat, unable to read or think, foot tapping up and down like some dumb wind-up toy. If Larry wasn't going to speak up in the next five minutes, she knew she was done for. She broke the news of her pregnancy to both Larry and her press secretary Millie and since then, they both have been quite silent, which made Olivia tremble in fear.

She bit her nails nervously, watching Larry pace in silence. Olivia knew what a big deal this was, especially since this time she was in a different position. Contrary to last time, she was married for quite a while before the news came out that she was expecting. This time, she knew that it would cause a lot of chaos and there was a potential it could hurt her career, seeing that she wasn't married nor did anybody know she was in a relationship.

The signs of pregnancy were there, she just chose to ignore them. The missed period, random dizzy spells she would get after walking around for an amount of time, the feeling of being exhausted frequently, and the gassy cramps she would get at night after having a drink or two before bedtime. Though there was a vague idea when her last monthly was, the doctor predicted she could be close to three months pregnant, perhaps a few weeks less. She knew she should have kept a close track of her symptoms, knowing her body was trying to tell her something.

With her first pregnancy, she was nauseated and sick from the first month to most of it but this time was different. There wasn't a sign of nausea and that's what made her ignore the rest of the symptoms. Olivia had a gut feeling something about her was off but never suspected she could be pregnant. Olivia and John never used protection and she just assumed that since nothing happened before, nothing would happen at all... but she was wrong.

After fifteen minutes of silence, Larry finally stopped and turned to her, "What are your thoughts on this, Olivia?"

She wasn't sure how she felt about anything. Olivia had no idea how to accept the fact that she was growing an actual human being inside of her, let alone deal with the fact that in six months, she was going to become a mother once again. Olivia wasn't sure if she was ready to go through all of the physical changes and emotions once again, especially since her last baby passed, leaving her in heartbreak. There were already worries in her mind about this baby but knew she needed to slow down this time, even if that meant putting her career on hold.

"I'm not sure what you want me to say, Larry," she paused, peering off to the side to Millie then met her eyes back with his, "I wanna keep this baby so don't try to divert me otherwise."

Larry pursed his lips, "I had a feeling you might say that." He placed his hands on his hips, turning to Millie, "I just don't understand how you couldn't have known you were almost three months pregnant?"

Olivia shamefully stared at the ground and curled her toes under, "I don't know, I just suspected my symptoms were from traveling."

Millie covered the end of the telephone, "Was there anybody else you had been with, Liv? Someone other than John?"

She shook her head, "It was always just John," she pulled her legs up on the chair, pulling them close to her chest, "I promise ya, he is the father."

"Well, what does he have to say about this?" Larry picked up his notepad and glimpsed around, trying to figure out how to make everything work out.

She lightly bit her lip, "I haven't told him yet," she drew in a large sigh, trying to shake off her anxiety.

Larry slowly made his way towards her, his head down, peeking at her written schedule on his notepad. He knew that a lot of these interviews, shoots, and shows would have to be held off until she could tell him, "I believe you should go and tell him. Today, in fact."