Nelson the Cat and his DANK Adventures 3

Story #1: The Wedding

Welcome old and new readers! Nelson is back at it again with 16 more DANK adventures to enjoy! Sit back and relax as you read the third entry to the most DANK book series in the universe! I thank you for the motivation. Enjoy! Also, don't forget to vote, comment, and share for more!

What the heck is going on!? Jaiden and Pamela started to act weird around each other, and then BAM, Jaiden proposes!? It got weirder from there! They actually are getting married six months after he proposes! That day is tomorrow! Soon, I'll be nothing more than a distraction! I know! I'll pop all the wheels to their cars! Then they can't go to their wedding!! Haha, I'm a stinking genius!

"Ayo, Jaiden!"

"What's up, Best Man!?"

"Hehe....right... I NEED TO PEE OUTSIDE!!"

"Pee outside!? What for!? You always pee in the bathroom?!"

"JAIDEN, IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH!"

"Nelson, you're not a girl!"

"NOT THAT, RAT!"

"Why then?! And why are you yelling so loud?!"

"I'M....UH....."

*ahem*

"Experimenting!"

"By letting loose outside?!"

"Yeah!"

"Whatever you say, Best Man!"

I hate it when he says "Best Man". I get closer and closer to jumping out of my window every time he says that. And he says it a lot. I'll probably be dead by the time the wedding starts.

Nelson slid down the railings of the apartment down to the car garage. He arrived at Jaiden's White Sedan and Pamela's Sports Car.

"Time to pop these babies, like I did with my fifty sodas last night for the How Bread Is Made marathon!"

Nelson pulled out a stinking taser!

"Hope this'll work!"

Nelson put it up to one of Jaiden's wheels.

*zap!*

Nothing happened.

"Dang it! Mind as well keep trying!"

*zap!*

Nelson kept zapping until the taser gave out.

"Come on!"

Nelson gave it a few hard smacks.

"Stupid taser. Policemen are stupid if they think this will ever shock a human!"

Nelson threw the taser across the garage.

"Now someone else can get arrested for having a taser without a permit."

Nelson then found a plastic knife on the ground beside him.

*thwump!*

Nelson stabbed the tire. Nothing happened.

"It was worth a try."

*bang! bang! bang! bang! bang! bang! bang! bang!*

*hisssssss*

Nelson looked back to see a car racing by in the garage with a man on top of the vehicle. He had a gun which he shot all the tires of both Jaiden and Pamela's vehicles with.

"You're welcome, bro!" The man yelled, driving away.

Nelson put up a gesture that said "rock on!".