As Nelson finished the fifteenth episode, in-a-row, of House Hunters, Pamela finally had enough.
"Nelson!" Pamela yelled.
"Do you mind?! The volume only goes so high!" Nelson explained.
"Get off your sorry butt and get over here," Pamela demanded, patting the kitchen seat next to her.
"And why would I do that?"
"Because I'm sick of you being depressed. Clearly, you can't get over Lola-"
"Lori," Nelson corrected.
"See! We're going to create you a dating profile on a dating website!"
Nelson sighed.
"Fine. Let me do the bio though," Nelson agreed.
Nelson backflipped behind the couch and sat next to Pamela.
"Okay."
Pamela showed Nelson what she had so far for the profile.
"Nelson Meem. Yes, that is my name. Gender is male. Yup, that is also correct. Profile picture. What!!" Nelson yelled.
"What what?!" Pamela asked desperately, looking at her phone.
"That's not a profile picture for a dating profile!" Nelson explained.
"What are you talking about? That's a picture of you sunbathing in the sunlight. What's hotter than that?"
"First of all, you suck. Second of all, that's weird that you just called me hot. Third of all, everyone knows not to use your real self for your profile picture," Nelson explained, raising a hairy toe every time he listed.
"Nelson, that's cat-fishing," Pamela explained.
"Well, we are looking for cats, aren't we? It says it in the name!"
"I don't think that's what they're saying-"
"Choose a buff dude!" Nelson interrupted.
Pamela rolled her eyes, and searched the internet for buff guys.
"This one?"
"No."
"This one?"
"Naw."
"How 'bout this?"
"Pamela, that's a furry."
"My bad. This one?"
"We're getting somewhere."
Pamela's breath just got knocked out of her with the hottest buff cat she's ever seen.
"You have to choose this one!" Pamela said.
"I'm not choosing a stinking furry! Keep going, Pam!"
"Agh! Fine!"
Pamela kept scrolling until Nelson slapped the phone out of her hand.
*slap!*
"Ow Nelson, what the heck!?"
"That's the one!"
Nelson picked up her phone like it was the last piece of bread.
"This one!" Nelson announced, shoving it in Pamela's face.
It was a ripped cat reading a book on a chaise wearing reading glasses.
Pamela was about to slap some sense into Nelson, but she remembered it wasn't her profile.
YOU ARE READING
Nelson the Cat and his DANK Adventures 3
فكاهة*#5 on childrensbook 9/8/18* (COMPLETED STORY) Nelson and company are back at it again with 16 MORE DANK adventures to enjoy! With these new stories, Nelson will discover new friends and enemies, some stories even life-changing! Find out what Nelson...
