Part 22

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     Ok, so you guys probably already know this, but I've been afk for over a year, probably almost two. It's just taken me a reallllllly long time to try and write this "goodbye" note because, in total honesty, I am a coward. Once I felt that my writing was too... blah to be posted on here, I thought that slowly fading away and abandoning this account was my only option. 

     But I'm resurrecting myself now because I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT ANYMORE. I don't want to be scared of any hate comments or empty feelings. I'm expecting the worst, and I'm okay with it. You guys DEFINITELY should be mad at me, even hate me, and I deserve it. Who am I to tell you to forgive me when I'm the one that bailed? There are no excuses on my end, just the truth.

     And the truth is, I started writing this when I was in eighth grade, and now it feels like a really cringey and unoriginal piece that was better in theory. But that is ALL I will say about the matter because come on, we've all heard this kind of story. I've READ hundreds of authors writing this same story in their author's notes and it broke my heart. And I never understood WHY they'd do that until it became my reality. All these tiny little reasons really take a toll on you, and are actually a lot more crushing than they seem.

     But I am not here to depress you guys, contrary to common belief and present company excluded. I'm not just gonna end everything right now, right here. I still want to write on Wattpad, and am still writing on Wattpad.

     Why? Because you guys are amazing, and the atmosphere is exhilerating! And when you write something you can actually look back on and not feel humiliated, it's like you're floating on air. It's just the BEST FEELING EVER, and I encourage every one of you to try it out sometime.

     I know we're all readers, DUH, but you guys are also all writers. Every single one of you. And I want all of you to know that "my" story isn't mine, it's everyone's. Meaning, if you really want a proper ending or epilogue to this, then you better write your heart out. Take whatever details you want out of this fanfic, and build upon them. I'm not picky. If anything, I WANT you guys to write more Rubiam fanfics, even take random scenarios from here and put your own kind of hot sauce on it ( I know, bad analogy :P).

     I lOVE Rubiam, and will ALWAYS love Rubiam. Why wouldn't I be happy if some of you guys choose to ignite the fandom even more? And if by some off chance, you actually take my advice, PLEASE tag me in it or message me. Not this account, because I'm kind of going to be AFK after this publishes, but on this new collab account I made with my friend: procrastinova.

     All of you check out the above account on the unlikely occasion that you're not fireball angry with me :) It's cool if you don't, but even cooler if you do XD. On it, we're making an original story that includes robots, badass females, and apocalyptic proportions. Since I'm making the story with a friend I see every day, the chances of us bailing is much lower :P. See, there's a bright side. Kinda.

     I know I've "talked" your ears off already, but I just have one more thing to say: Never be afraid to start something. Ending it can sometimes be tricky, but at least you have the ability to say that YOU started something. That you took the initiative to just dive right into a project without knowing squat about the future. I'm not talking about me, I hardly took initiative, but I'm talking about you guys. Just don't overthink before you post a chapter. Sure, it can get you in sticky situations like mine, but I will never regret sharing Ruby and Liam's adventures with you guys.

     I wish I wrote them better, definitely, but even though I don't enjoy them as much as I used to, I'm glad at least one person out there can. That's why this story won't ever be deleted. I love it too much. If not the actual content, then what it represents: my first fanfic, hundreds of smiles, and a lot of good times in the past.

     I'm glad you can't see me because I'm tearing up like a little kid :):( So many memories are just flooding back and I just can't handle them. This story was like my medicine, and it blocked out the whole messed up world. BUT I will NOT be sappy. I'm sorry for the tangent!!!!

     Just remember that I have a new account, message me whenever, and that I LOVE YOU ALL! 

     Comment your hate right here, I'll be awaiting it patiently. Definitely no hard feelings! Feel free to ramble!

     Panda out


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