In His Eyes

Chapter Five

"They never knew that they could become homesick for each other too."

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V E R O N I C A

I've always wondered how the human mind works, all the thinking and sometimes doing things we aren't aware of. What fascinates me the most is how we perceive curiosity and how it's being produced in the brain.

Crazy how a person can do just a few of the psychological tricks to bring it out of you, even if you've spent your whole life trying to bury anything quite similar to emotions deep, deep inside, hoping nobody would find that old pile of clothes again.

It's a safe choice when you can manipulate every emotion coming out of you, becoming dangerous and simply unbreakable. It sure may be a pussy move considering that you're practically running away from your feelings. But what happens when you can't do it anymore?

That's one thing I never hope to experience.

Don't you want to feel happiness again, Veronica?

I can't settle for anything that doesn't last. Feeling happiness is very good, but the aftermath is the one thing I can't survive. I'd rather not process anything than have a rollercoaster with good and bad every time. I don't think somebody can put up with me enough to reach that phase where he makes me happy.

Sure sounds sad.

"Eat it." Blake demands again breaking my consultation with myself.

I sigh. "It's way to early. My appetite is down I don't feel like putting anything in my stomach, as I already mentioned."

"You won't die if you eat it."

I sigh. "Blake, you're triggering my anger. I don't want to eat it, you need it more."

We've been arguing over this for the last ten minutes. You see, he ordered one family sized pizza and I keep telling him that I can eat my part when we return from school, but he doesn't understand anything I say anymore.

"Tell me everything you ate and drank today and I'll leave you alone."

I shake my head. "How am I supposed to remember that? I've been up for less than two hours, drop it. When I'm hungry, I'll come and get some. I know where the kitchen is located."

"But we'll be at school." He adds with a small voice.

He just made me feel bad about it. Fuck this shit. I wrap my arms around his neck and bring him for an appreciation hug. "Thank you for taking care of me."

"You're not as problematic as you think."

As much as I enjoy my alone time, I can get lonely sometimes. He's always there when it happens and I feel like I don't show my gratefulness as much as I should.

"I'll take some pizza to school, we'll wrap it around something." I say, breaking apart the hug and ruffling his hair.

"I can wrap it around aluminum foil, you can place it in your backpack afterwards." He says. "Go, put some boots on, I'll do the job and I'll meet you there. How many slices?"