lui ou lui

~Jealous~

Tanner's POV 

Yesterday I missed Paul like crazy. Woods needed me though, and I was happy to be there for him. I had to make it up to Paul today. Maybe I'll finally get the question out. The drive to work was quiet. The dry lands of California raced past as I went down the road. Amazingly, I get to the office in what feels like record time. First thing I do is look for the cutie who has stolen my heart. 

I was sure now. Paul. Paul is the one. Ever since the night at the beach I had been sure. Just thinking about him on my lap and our lips touching gave me butterflies in my stomach. That's something I never want to forget, and never want to give up. All that needs to be done now is let him know how I feel. 

The way that he smiles and the sound of his laugh sends sparks through my body. Everything feels perfect and calm when he's wrapped up in my arms. My heart feels safe with him. He's safe. He's extraordinary. I don't want to lose Paul. 

I walked into red base and then into Paul's shared office. Connor wasn't there and I quietly thanked God for that. Paul looked up at me with those green eyes and I couldn't help but smile. As I closed the door he raised an eyebrow at me suspiciously. Once it the door clicks, and I turn the lock, the distance between us is closed in a few easy steps. 

Our lips smash together needily. This was dangerous my mind screamed at me. All care was thrown out the window though. Let someone find us. Fuck it. Paul ran his fingers through my hair and pulled me even closer. He began to lightly tug on it, and I had to pull away. 

Paul gave me puppy eyes, "something wrong? I was enjoying that," he whined. 

"Me too," I gasped, "a little too much," Realization dawned across his face and he turned red. 

"Oh." 

"I definitely can't wait for lunch though. I have a special surprise," I leaned back in for one final kiss and then left the room. 

Next place to go was to find Woods. It was his first day back at work since... Yeah. After searching the bases I found him in the Rekt set. He was talking to Mitch and standing really close to him. It made me a little uncomfortable, but I tried to ignore it. I had no right to be jealous. I picked Paul. I don't think Mitch likes guys anyways...does he? Suddenly I'm hyper aware of how attractive Mitch is, and how Woods' hand is resting on the other boys bicep. 

I snap out of it when they notice me and take a step apart. Woods' face seems a little flushed. Shut up Tanner. You. Picked. Paul. Get over it. I walk up to the two boys and reflexively put my arm around Woods' waist. Mitch gave me a look and then rolled his eyes, going back to whatever he was doing before. Woods untangled himself from my arm, and put some space between us. 

"Hey Tanner, what's going on?" Woods asked quietly. 

"Uh nothing," the whole scene had thrown me off, "I just wanted to make sure you were...you know, doing okay." 

"Yeah yeah, I'm fine," he whispered in a hushed tone, "look man I have to get back to...work." Woods strode past me and left me standing there confused. That was...weird. 

Woods' POV 

I closed the bathroom door and locked it. It felt like the walls were closing in on me, and I couldn't breathe. Everything that just happened sent me into an anxiety attack. Mitch. Tanner seeing me and Mitch. Tanner asking how I was. What if someone heard? I don't want everyone to know how fucked up I am. Mitch asked if I liked guys. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. 

If I didn't steady my breathing soon I was going to pass out. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. These calming techniques worked when this sort of thing happened more often. It's helping now too. My hands were trembling still. I've never had an attack at work, and I have no clue what to do. 

I don't want anyone to find me like this. There has to be a way to calm down, now. All of a sudden there's a stabbing pain in my left arm. Looking down I see that I was the cause of it. My nails were digging so far in that they drew blood. I wish I could say it didn't feel good. That it didn't relax me just a little. But it did. 

Now that the initial panic had subsided I realize that I need to hide these tiny wounds. It wouldn't be too hard to lie about, but better safe than sorry. Since it was the Rekt bathroom, it was stocked with first aid supplies. I located a bandaid large enough to cover the markings. There. All better. Right? If only it was that easy to fix the inside. 

A/N - so. Mitch. Bet you didn't see that coming, huh? Also woods not being okay. Also also Tanner being an indecisive little shit. Well at least a decided but still jealous little shit lol. UNTIL NEXT TIME 

~Stay Lovely~