5SOS Preferences

#68 Leaving

#68 Leaving

Calum:
The two of you sat in silence. Not a comfortable silence, but not entirely awkward either. It was just empty air between the two of you. He was leaving soon, for tour with his band. And as hard as you'd tried, you couldn't go with him.

Now you two had a problem.

Moments before, the two of you had been fighting. Normally the two of you didn't fight often, and when you did it was over petty things like him coming home late all the time or not picking up after himself. This one, though, was a little more lethal.

"Calum you're going to be surrounded by girls who would do anything to get into bed with you! And, I just," you stuttered.

"I don't know if I can handle that, constantly wondering what you're doings and constantly wondering, if, I don't know..."

"Seriously, babe?" he looked at you, annoyance flittering through his expression.

"You're worried about me cheating on you? Are you a fucking idiot?" he inched a step closer to you and took your hands in his.

"Do you ever wonder how many times, whenever I go away or I'm on tour, that I think about you? Not sexually or anything, just genuinely think about you. You could easily meet another guy, who'd be there for you. Easily. He'd be here for you and didn't have to leave for months at a time. He'd be good to you, better than I could ever be. Do you know how many hours of sleep I've lost, thinking about you? And how much better off you'd be without me?" he captured you in a hug.

"I know you're better off without me. I know that. And yet, I can't help but be selfish, and want you here with me. I need you. I need you so much, and I don't want to fight. Not about jealousy. Not when I'm gonna leave soon. I can't leave us here at such a bad note. I can't."

"You'll have to," you snarled.

"Come on, baby, please. Don't be like this." You looked at him pathetically.

"What the hell am I supposed to do?" you asked, rhetorically.

"I need you too, Cal. I do. I really fucking do. But the distance..." you shook your head.

"It's just, I-I'm scared," you voiced, taking a seat back on your couch. He didn't respond, he just sat next to you, patiently waiting for you to explain. It was rare for you and Calum to have heart to hearts like these. But every once in a while they were necessary, if you didn't want your relationship to fall apart.

"We're gonna be apart for a really long time, I mean, are we sure that this is gonna work? Are we really sure that we can make us work?" you looked down, not wanting to look Calum in the eyes. He was silent for a long time.

"Is that really how you feel? Do you want to just, end this?" he finally asked.

"Of course not, I mean, God, I love you, Cal, and I really want to make us work, it's just, I don't know, is that the right choice to make? Would it be better if, I don't know, if we just called the whole thing off and go our separate ways?"

"I know we can make this work," he took your hand.

"It's gonna be hard, but I'm positive we'll be okay. You still want us, right?" he asked, searching your face for any sign of hesitation.

"Of course," you nodded.

"I love you Cal, I just want you to have your priorities. Your band, and your music, should be your main focus right now. You shouldn't have to worry about a girlfriend who's thousands of miles away."

"You talk about yourself like you're just another thing," he frowned.

"You're everything to me. I'm not giving you up. Not now, not ever. I don't care if it'll be hard and, I'm not gonna lie, I feel that way, too. Like this is impossible and why are we even trying. But I love you, and you love me, so this is gonna work. It has to."